BASIC20201125

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ONE YEAR OLDER _ Ben Stein (Ferris Bueller’s Day Off) is 76. John Larroquette (Night Court) is 73. Dancing With the Stars judge Bruno Tonioli is 65. Jill Hennessy (Law & Order, Crossing Jordan) is 51. Christina Applegate (Dead to Me) is 49.

TOPIC: WHAT’S ON TOP OF YOUR FRIDGE? _ Facebook this: If I were to come to your house and steal what’s on top of your fridge, what would I be getting?

THANKSGIVING THE TOP DAY FOR HOME FIRES _ Thanksgiving is the traditional day to count your blessings, but for some it is also the day to set the house on fire. There are more home fires on Thanksgiving than any other day of the year, with fire departments responding to triple the normal number of incidents. And, according to the National Fire Protection Association, most of these fires originate in the kitchen from clumsy or inattentive cooks.

NEWS ATTACK! _ Researchers are attempting to understand why sick people show up for work in the office. [Because no matter how bad their co-workers are they’d rather spend the day with them then with Rachael Ray and Dr. Phil.]

BACON-SCENTED UNDERWEAR _ J&D’s Foods, makers of Bacon Salt, has the perfect holiday gift for the bacon-lover in your family: Bacon Scented Underwear. From the company’s press release: “Featuring state of the art moisture-wicking, scent-emission technology stolen from NASA, we’ve embedded the smell of everyone’s favorite smell into the fabric of your pants. This intoxicating scent will last through multiple wash cycles and wearings.”

… You can buy bacon-scented underwear for women and men.

TOPIC: WHAT AGE DO YOU THINK COUPLES SHOULD STOP HOLDING HANDS? _ You’ll get great comments on this one for your Facebook page: “Someone online asked: At what age do you think couples should stop holding hands?”

SEND A ‘HAPPY THANKSGIVING’ TO YOUR NUMBER NEIGHBOR _ Here’s one every member of your show can do, and it would be fun for listeners. Send texts that say “Happy Thanksgiving from your number neighbor” to the numbers that are one up and one down from yours. So if your number ends in 5632, send the texts to 5631 and 5633.

… Take a screenshot of the reply and share it on social media. Encourage listeners to send a text and to share their screenshots.

DON’T TEXT ‘OK’ _ You should stop texting ‘OK’ to people. Or ‘yes’. Apparently these words, without an exclamation point or an accompanying emoji, can come off as passive aggressive, dismissive, or angry. This comes from New York Times advice columnist Caity Weaver. In person an ‘OK’ comes with a facial expression, a positive delivery, maybe even a thumbs-up. By text, ‘OK’ or just ‘yes’ are cold and could be seen as rude.

DEATH BY MINOR INJURY _ Facebook this: If your last minor injury actually killed you instead, what would you have died doing? Some comments from the internet:

• Hiking with preschoolers.
• Pizza cutter dropped on my foot.
• Bathing my cats.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: ROBBER GETS DRUNK, PASSES OUT _ In Finland, a man went to a hotel and threatened the receptionist with a weapon, demanding money from the register, and some booze. The receptionist was then taken to an ATM to withdraw money and then forced into a taxi. The thief then drank to the point where he passed out, giving the taxi driver time to alert police.