COUNTRY October 15, 2015

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Bits & Breaks • Country Prep • Datebook • Datebook Tomorrow • Entertainment • Fun & Games • Image of the Day • Joke of the Day! • Last Minute Items • News & Nuggets • News Attack • Number for the Day • Television • Video of the Day • Wacky-But-True

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DATEBOOK: OCTOBER 15, 2015

This is day 288 of 2015. There are 77 days remaining.

BIRTHDAYS

• Linda Lavin (Alice) is 78

• Penny Marshall is 72

• Richard Carpenter of The Carpenters is 69

• TV chef Emeril Lagasse is 56

• Trading Spaces host Paige Davis is 46

• Dominic West is 46

IT HAPPENED TODAY

• 1860: Eleven-year-old Grace Bedell of Westfield, New York, wrote a letter to presidential candidate Abraham Lincoln, suggesting he could improve his appearance by growing a beard.

• 1951: I Love Lucy premiered on CBS.

• 1989: Wayne Gretzky of the Los Angeles Kings surpassed Gordie Howe’s NHL career scoring record of 1,850 points.

• 1990: Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev was named the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize.

• 1991: The Senate narrowly confirmed the nomination of Clarence Thomas to the Supreme Court, 52-48.

• 1993: Nelson Mandela and F.W. de Klerk were named winners of the Nobel Peace Prize for their efforts to end apartheid in South Africa.

• 2001: Taxi driver Elaine Crame of Lambourn, England, finally changed her mind and agreed to marry garage manager Jim Enevoldsen. He’d been asking “morning, noon, and night” for 17 years. Jim said, “It just goes to show you must never give up.”

• 2005: Iraqis voted to approve a constitution.

• 2007: Appleton, Wisconsin, police received a call reporting a burglary in which the thief apparently entered an unlocked apartment and walked away with a pizza, six eggs, a can of beef ravioli, a can of peaches and one chicken-and-broccoli Hot Pocket.

• 2008: U.S. presidential candidate Barack Obama became the first candidate to purchase ad space in video games. The Obama campaign purchased ad space inside “Madden ’09” and others. The ads appeared on billboards and other signage within the game.

SPECIAL EVENTS

• Conflict Resolution Day

• Get to Know Your Customers Day

• Global Handwashing Day

• International Day of Rural Women

• National Cake Decorating Day

• National Grouch Day

• National Mushroom Day

• National Red Wine Day

UPCOMING

• October 27: World Series begins

• October 31: Halloween

• November 1: Daylight Saving Time ends

• More holidays – Updated with 2016 holidays.

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NUMBER FOR THE DAY

14,000: Department stores in the U.S.

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NEWS ATTACK!

A pregnant woman traveling on China Airlines unexpectedly gave birth weeks ahead of schedule. She was in labor for two hours in the air. [She was so happy when she finally gave birth, and the pilot switched off the umbilical cord sign.]

A Vatican cardinal referred to liberals as beasts of the Apocalypse. [This guy is always saying outrageous things. They call him Father Trump.]

When American Airlines kicked a crying woman off a flight for no apparent reason the rest of the passengers booed the flight crew. [Getting booed at work — welcome to my world.]

In Marvel Comics only Thor can lift his hammer. Now a California engineer has created a replica of Thor’s hammer that only he can lift. [Because apparently, the engineering problem of getting clean drinking water to poor people around the world has already been licked.]

A Mexican restaurant in Brooklyn is giving away 10% ownership to anyone who can eat a 30-pound burrito in 1 hour. [Because anyone stupid enough to gorge himself on a 30-pound burrito is stupid enough to get into the restaurant business.]

A man brought an old photo from a Fresno junk store for 88 cents that turns out to be a rare photo of Billy the Kidd and his gang playing croquet. It’s expected to sell at auction for as much as $5 million. [Now he wishes that he had also grabbed the photo of them playing badminton.]

A man brought an old photo from a Fresno junk store for 88 cents that turns out to be a rare photo of Billy the Kidd and his gang playing croquet. It’s expected to sell at auction for as much as $5 million. [Criminals have always loved their selfies.]

Dole is recalling spinach due to salmonella. [To the delight of children everywhere.]

A Buffalo-area woman is suing a hospital that pronounced her husband dead after the doctor refused to listen to her when she tried to tell him that her husband was still alive. The doctor didn’t check a pulse until hours later. By then it was too late to save him. [“But he’s not dead. He always makes that face.”]

Another study has concluded that drinking red wine daily has lots of health benefits. But the study found that the amount is important. It shouldn’t be more than one glass per night. [No matter whom your daughter brings home as a date.]

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NEWS & NUGGETS

AN ALIEN MEGASTRUCTURE MAY HAVE BEEN DISCOVERED _ A group of scientists are adamant that researchers, baffled by the discovery of a huge object that appears to be blocking a bizarre star, have stumbled upon an “alien megastructure” that they think has been built by extraterrestrials. The Kepler Space Telescope has been monitoring an area of space known as KIC 946285 for close to 7 years now. It is located around 1,480 light-years away, and the strange fluctuation in the light that it emits has left researchers and scientists completely baffled. Because of its bizarre light fluctuations, which scientists are at odds to explain, a group of their peers now insist that a huge alien megastructure has been built and is blocking the star.

… Tabetha Boyajian, who is a postdoctorate at Yale University, explained, “We’d never seen anything like this star. It was really weird. We thought it might be bad data or movement on the spacecraft, but everything checked out.” • SOURCE

SOME PEOPLE THINK MAN’S ALREADY BEEN TO MARS _ The Martian is killing it at the box office, and has reinvigorated the discussion about getting a man to Mars. NASA’s got a plan to get some of us to the Red Planet in the next 20 years — but some people think we’ve already been there. A new survey finds 7% of adults think man has already stepped foot on Mars.

SITTING MIGHT NOT KILL YOU AFTER ALL _ Sitting, it’s been said, is the new smoking. Studies have shown that sitting increases the risk of heart disease, cancer and diabetes, to name just a few ailments —​ even for people who exercise regularly. A new study, however, throws some cold water on those claims. Plopping down in a chair for extended periods of time is not associated with an increased risk of death, according to the study published this week. The study’s authors (from Great Britain’s University of Exeter and University College London)​ also cast doubt on the importance of standing desks. Basically, any time you’re not moving — sitting or standing — is bad for your health if you’re not otherwise getting exercise. Researchers said: “Any stationary posture where energy expenditure is low may be detrimental to health, be it sitting or standing.”

NEW BEER MILE WORLD RECORD _ We have an unofficial beer mile world record. Corey Gallagher ran a time of 4:54.4 at the University of Manitoba on Saturday. If certified by the experts at BeerMile.com, Gallagher’s performance will stand as the new beer mile world record over current world leader Lewis Kent, who lowered the time to 4:55.8 in August.

… Gallagher, a Canadian mail carrier, won the first ever Beer Mile World Championships in December 2014 with a winning time of 5:00.23.

GEEK KEEPS HIS CONSOLE ON FOR 20 YEARS TO KEEP GAME PROGRESS _ A guy on Twitter (@Wanikun) say he has kept his Nintendo Super NES (Famicom) on for the past 20 years because he refuses to lose his progress in one of his favorite classic video games (Umihara Kawase). Years ago many game cartridges had some integrated storage which allowed gamers to save their games, but unfortunately, the batteries keeping the storage “alive” eventually died. The gamer says his game console and the cartridge plugged into it have been in operation for over 180,000 hours.

TOP RESTAURANT GROUP TO ELIMINATE TIPPING _ A restaurant group that includes some of Manhattan’s most well-regarded dining spots said on Wednesday it will take the potentially revolutionary step in the United States of eliminating tipping. Union Square Hospitality Group , which employs about 1,800 people at more than a dozen popular hot spots, will roll out the no-tipping policy starting next month.

Start it on Facebook, take it to the phones: Is it time to ending tipping? Servers often make way below minimum wage because the government and restaurant owners know they’ll make tips. So what if prices were raised but tipping was eliminated?

CALIFORNIA TO HELP ‘REVENGE PORN’ VICTIMS FIGHT BACK _ The state of California has unveiled a website designed to help people whose nude images and videos have been posted online without their consent. The site includes specific directions for how victims can report the crime to authorities and petition companies like Snapchat, 4chan and Google to remove the images. California was the first state in the country to make the practice of posting nude image without consent, often referred to as “revenge porn,” illegal and punishable by jail time.

IRAQ VET’S SON CREATES APP THAT STOPS NIGHT TERRORS _ A Minnesota college student has created an app that stops night terrors. When Tyler Skluzacek was in sixth grade his dad came back from Iraq and struggled with night terrors. Now a senior in college, Tyler and some friends have created an app called myBivy — short for “bivouac,” the military term for a place to sleep — that tracks soldiers as they sleep. By tracking heart rate and movement for a few weeks, the app “can find the exact symptoms of the onset of the panic attack.” Then, when those symptoms are detected, the app uses the smartwatch or smartphone to which it’s connected to disrupt the pattern via sound or vibration, taking the soldier out of a deep sleep but keeping him or her asleep.

UNBORN BABIES CAN ‘SING’ AS EARLY AS 16 WEEKS _ Scientists in Barcelona, Spain (Institut Marques) have discovered that unborn babies can already hear and respond to music much sooner than previously believed. The scientists say an unborn baby detects and responds to sound at 16 weeks. They found that whenever they transmit music intravaginally, unborn babies appear to be “trying to speak or sing” as they respond to music by moving their mouth and tongue.

WOMAN MET FUTURE HUSBAND ON DATING APP WHILE 8 MONTHS PREGNANT _ Lance Connors met his now-wife Sarah on a dating app when she was eight months pregnant. While she didn’t really expect anyone to be interested in dating her while pregnant, the 28-year-old UK woman ended up meeting her future husband Lance. Sarah said she was open about the fact she was pregnant when she joined the dating app, so there were no surprises when she and Lance had their first date. Sarah says they met at a pub to have a meal together and “I think he was shocked when he saw the size of my bump.” When baby Elodie was born a few weeks later, Lance gave the new mom some time to adjust to the demands of caring for a newborn. But they soon started seeing each other more regularly and were engaged within five months. The couple married this year and Elodie, who is now 2, calls Lance Daddy.

AUTOPILOT FOR THE TESLA MODEL S IS HERE FOR $2,500 _ Starting today (Thursday) Tesla Model S owners will have receive an over-the-air software update. The new 7.0 software will bring with it a new, more modern look to the operating system, some new instrument panel apps, climate control interface improvements, and Autopilot. Autopilot, however, will cost every Tesla Model S owner $2,500.

… The Autopilot system is made up of several different subsystems that include Autosteer, Auto Lane Change, Traffic-Aware Cruise Control, Side Collision Warning and Autopark.

… With Autosteer on sensors in the front of the Model S monitor the lane markings ahead and automatically adjust steering to keep the car within the markings. Like all other self-steering systems from other automakers, including Honda and Mercedes-Benz, the driver must keep his or her hands on the wheel at all times.

… Auto Lane Change works when Autosteer and Traffic-Aware Cruise Control are engaged. Say you want to pass the car ahead of you — simply signal in the direction in which you want to merge and the Model S will move into the lane in the direction you indicated with your turn signal.

IT’S RED WINE DAY _ Today is Red Wine Day, so it’s a good day to share the news that red wine drinkers had better levels of HDL cholesterol, better sleep and lower cardiometabolic risk factors. Researchers say a single, regular serving of wine a night is what you need. When you drink more the negatives of red wine begin to outweigh the positives.

AIRLINE KICKED WOMAN OFF A PLANE FOR THE BEST REASON _ Southwest Airlines went above and beyond after they learned that the son of one of their passengers had just been in a life threatening accident. Peggy Uhle was in her seat, readying herself for a flight from Chicago to Columbus, when the plane turned back to the gate and she was asked to get off. She figured she was on the wrong plane. Instead she found out her son, who lives in Denver, was in a coma after suffering a head injury. Even before Uhle had disembarked, the airline rebooked her on the next non-stop flight to Denver — free of charge. They offered her private waiting area, rerouted her luggage, allowed her to board first, and packed a lunch for when she got off the plane in Denver. They even delivered her luggage to where she was staying in Denver AND received a call from Southwest asking how her son was doing. Uhle said her son is still recovering but she couldn’t be more grateful for the way she was treated.

GOODBYE TO ‘HE’ AND ‘SHE’ AND HELLO TO ‘ZE’? _ The idea that a person is a “he” and “she” seems to offend some people. In fact, Facebook has over 50 gender options for users to choose from. Now some people who are “gender-neutral” are calling themselves “ze”.

ENGINEER BUILDS ‘WORKING’ THOR’S HAMMER THAT ONLY HE CAN LIFT _ In Marvel comics, Thor’s legendary hammer is famous for being able to be wielded only by the worthy. Electrical engineer Allen Pan decided to replicate in his very own take on a “working” Thor’s hammer. To make the hammer immovable, he decided that strong magnets were the best method. Inside the head of his hammer he packed a microwave oven transformer electromagnet, which uses electricity to produce a magnetic field. This creates a very strong magnetic pull, strong enough that the hammer, when placed on a metal surface, feels too heavy to lift. The handle is attached to a capacitive touch sensor. As soon as someone grasps the handle, the electromagnets switch on, attaching the hammer to the metal surface. However, the hammer can be turned off via a fingerprint sensor keyed to Pan’s thumbprint. When Pan grasps the hammer, the magnets switch on. When he moves his thumb over the sensor, it switches off again, allowing Pan to lift the hammer. • VIDEO

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WACKY-BUT-TRUE

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MAN ARRESTED FOR DUI WHILE IN ELECTRIC WHEELCHAIR _ A 54-year-old Florida man was arrested while blocking a pedestrian bridge inside a park. Passersby called in complaints, so the police came, who subsequently noted that Ronny Hicks “appeared to be highly intoxicated” while operating his electric wheelchair. Hicks was arrested for what could be his third DUI in a decade, but according to his attorney the wheelchair DUI conviction is unlikely.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MOM TRIED TO SMUGGLE DRUGS TO JAILED DAUGHTER IN TAMPONS _ An Oregon mother was sentenced to 30 days in jail for trying to smuggle drugs to her incarcerated daughter by hiding them in tampons.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: WOMAN CALLS 911 ABOUT MISPLACED PHONE _ A Connecticut (Middleton) woman was arrested for repeatedly abusing 911 after she called to report that she had misplaced her cell phone.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MEERKAT EXPERT ATTACKED MONKEY HANDLER OVER LLAMA KEEPER _ A former meerkat expert at London Zoo has been ordered to pay compensation to a monkey handler she attacked with a wine glass in a love spat over a llama-keeper. A judge said that Caroline Westlake must pay $1,235 to Kate Sanders for assaulting her in a dispute over colleague Adam Davies, who had dated both women.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: BEAR WALKS INTO HIGH SCHOOL, HANGS OUT FOR A WHILE _ A bear walked into a Bozeman, Montana high school Wednesday morning, sniffing around for a while before going on his or her way. The bear then found its way inside through a garage door in the back of the school’s building. Once outside, the bear scampered off into some woods near the school, never to be heard from again.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MAN TRIES TO PUT OUT FIRE BY DRIVING OVER IT _ A Clay County, Missouri man had been setting garbage on fire in a field. The fire started getting out of hand, so the man hopped in his van and drove back and forth over the flames in an effort to put it out. Then the man remembered he had both a full tank of gas AND firearms ammunition in the vehicle. The burning smell started getting stronger and the man realized his tires were on fire. The man bailed on the vehicle and ran off to safety. A short time later a sheriff’s deputy reported he heard the sound of ammo going off inside the van. No one was harmed and firefighters put out the blaze.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: CHICKEN PLACE HAS A LIVE CHICKEN RUNNING ITS TWITTER ACCOUNT _ An Australia-based barbecue chicken restaurant chain has is trying to set a world record for the first chicken to tweet an actual word. The company, Chicken Treat, has set up a chicken coop with a computer. Betty the chicken spends her time in the coop and tweets when she walks over the keyboard. So far everything Betty’s tweet on the @ChickenTreat account has been nonsense.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: NAKED WOMAN TRASHED SUBWAY RESTAURANT _ A naked woman went on a rampage and trashed a Subway restaurant in Anchorage, Alaska. Police attribute her erratic behavior to synthetic marijuana. The Subway is in rough shape, and the woman is now in police custody.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: DRUNK DRIVING SUSPECT, ASKED TO STEP OUT OF CAR, CHECKS FACEBOOK FEED INSTEAD _ A 39-year-old Massachusetts man, suspected of drunk driving, was asked by police to step out of his car. Instead he opted to scroll through his Facebook feed. The suspect eventually got out of the car and went on to resist arrest. The police posted an account of the incident, along with man’s mug shot, on their Facebook page about five hours later.

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ON TELEVISION

NFL THURSDAY NIGHT KICKOFF (8p ET, CBS) — James Brown hosts, with analysts Deion Sanders and Bill Cowher.

GREY’S ANATOMY (8p ET, ABC) — New

HEROES REBORN (8p ET, NBC) — New

BONES (8p ET, FOX) — New

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES (8p ET, CW) — New

NFL FOOTBALL (8:25p ET, CBS) — The Atlanta Falcons travel to New Orleans to take on the Saints in an important NFC South matchup.

SCANDAL (9p ET, ABC) — New

THE BLACKLIST (9p ET, NBC) — New

SLEEPY HOLLOW (9p ET, FOX) — New

THE ORIGINALS (9p ET, CW) — New

PROJECT RUNWAY (9p ET, Lifetime) — In this new edition, the designers use 3D-printing technology to create avant-garde styles. The guest judge is Mel B.

HOW TO GET AWAY WITH MURDER (10p ET, ABC) — New

THE PLAYER (10p ET, NBC) — New

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ENTERTAINMENT

MATT JACKSON’S 13-GAME JEOPARDY! STREAK ENDS _ Matt Jackson’s 13-game Jeopardy! winning streak has come to an end. The 23-year-old paralegal from Washington fell to New York City’s Michael Baker after amassing $411,612 in total winnings. Those winnings puts him fourth on the all-time regular season (non-tournament) money winning list. He is behind notable contestants Ken Jennings ($2,520,700 over 74 wins), Dave Madden ($432,400 over 19 wins) and Julia Collins ($428,100 over 20 wins).

… Jackson’s qualified to return for the Tournament of Champions, airing November 9 to 20.

SOURCE: KHLOÉ KARDASHIAN FORCED TO MAKE MEDICAL DECISIONS FOR LAMAR _ The Kardashians are preparing to say goodbye to Lamar Odom as he lies in a coma after being found unresponsive in a Las Vegas-area brothel Tuesday night. A source tells People: “They’re pretty sure this is goodbye, but they’re praying for a miracle.” Estranged wife Khloé Kardashian has not left Odom’s side since rushing to the hospital where he is being treated. Kim Kardashian West and Kris Jenner have also rallied around the former basketball player.

… Though Kardashian and Odom both signed divorce papers in July, a judgement has not yet been entered into court, meaning they are still legally married — and the reality star is in charge of his medical care.

NEW DIE HARD MOVIE FEATURING YOUNG JOHN MCCLANE _ There are discussions for a sixth installment of Die Hard that would serve as a quasi-prequel for Bruce Willis’ cop character John McClane. In this new film, a younger McClane would be cast for a storyline set in New York City in 1979, though the film would also feature Willis as McClane in present day.

PTC TRASHES MCDONALD’S OVER SCREAM QUEENS SPONSORSHIP _ The Parents Television Council is tired of seeing McDonald’s ads showing up in edgier, rougher shows — and wants the fast food giant to change its marketing game plant. The PTC says McDonald’s “seems to have charted a course that … really focuses on … content that is way more explicit than what they’ve done in years past.”

SCOTT DISICK CHECKS INTO REHAB _ Scott Disick has checked into rehab for drugs and alcohol abuse. The 32-year-old was said to have been seeking treatment for addiction at a drug rehabilitation center in Malibu. Us Weekly, which was first to report Scott’s rehab treatment, provided no further details on it.

REESE WITHERSPOON, MILA KUNIS SERIES IN DEVELOPMENT AT ABC _ Reese Witherspoon and Mila Kunis are getting behind the camera for two potential ABC series. The network is developing dramas with both women attached as exec producers. Kunis will serve as a producer on the television adaptation of Black Stiletto, based on the novels of the same name, while Witherspoon will work on an untitled romantic mystery.

GODZILLA VS. KING KONG COMING IN 2020 _ The Godzilla and King Kong franchises will be married into a single shared universe and now we hear Godzilla vs. King Kong will open in 2020, following Kong: Skull Island in 2017 and Godzilla 2 in 2018.

BROOKLYN NINE-NINE LINES UP NICK OFFERMAN _ Nick Offerman will guest star on Brooklyn Nine-Nine. The Parks and Recreation alum will play the ex-boyfriend of Andre Braugher’s Captain Holt in an episode airing this November.

IS HUGH JACKMAN “QUITTING HOLLYWOOD?” _ Did you see the stories that Hugh Jackman is  “quitting Hollywood?” The source was OK! and a rep for Jackman calls the story ridiculous.

JANE FONDA WENT SKINNY-DIPPING WITH MICHAEL JACKSON _ In a new interview with The Hollywood Reporter, Jane Fonda reveals that she got close to the King of Pop while she filmed On Golden Pond in the early ’80s — and the pair indulged in a little swimming in the buff. Fonda says, “[Michael] came and stayed for 10 day [during filming]. We lived together. I went skinny-dipping with him…”

TOM BRADY HATES JUNK FOOD _ Tom Brady has been the subject of controversy lately, but it’s pretty easy to agree with the quarterback’s stance on junk food. Brady discussed the role that healthy eating plays in his performance on the field during a recent radio appearance. He said a veggie-heavy acid-alkaline diet helps him reduce inflammation and ward off injury. He then went on to say that he’s tried to convince other players to adopt his clean eating philosophy, but they, like most Americans, are “brainwashed to believe” that junk food is acceptable fuel.

… Brady says, “I think we’ve been lied to by a lot of food companies over the years, by a lot of beverage companies over the years. But we still do it. That’s just America. We believe that Frosted Flakes is a food… You just keep eating those things, and you keep wondering why we have just incredible rates of disease in our country. No one thinks it has anything to do with what we put in our body.” He also likened Coca-Cola to “poison for kids,” and described soda advertisements as “quackery.”

AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL IS OVER AFTER THIS SEASON _ America’s Next Top Model will end after its current cycle. The show’s series finale airs December 4. Host Tyra Banks confirmed the news on her Instagram account. America’s Next Top Model premiered in 2003 on UPN, and was the first series to debut on The CW on September 20, 2006.

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BITS & BREAKS

MLB POST-SEASON

One-click guide to the current standings.

#SCARYADVICEIN4WORDS

The hashtag #ScaryAdviceIn4Words has been trending on Twitter.

• Yum! Truck stop sushi!

• Go outside and socialize.

• Get in the van.

… Got some scary advice in 4 words for us?

THINGS YOU WANT LEARN

Get this up on Facebook then launch a show conversation and phoner with the responses.

What are 3 things you want to learn? Some people will post “how to speak French,” or “how to cook real food.” Others will dig deeper: “How to be a better husband/father.”

BOOK TITLE STORY TIME

Challenge listeners or co-hosts to come up with a story from a real book title they’ve never read. The book is “Absolute Beginners”. Who can invent the better story?

… The real book is from 1959. It’s a novel written from the first person perspective of a teenage freelance photographer, who lives in a rundown yet vibrant part of West London.

MOVING STORIES

Some friends recently moved. Somehow, when their stuff arrived in their new city — a few days after they did — the wrong couch was mixed up with their stuff. Movers brought it in my friends’ new home before they saw it coming off the truck.

Start it on Facebook, take it to the phones: Moving is sooo tough. Give us your “Moving Nightmare Story”.

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FUN & GAMES

TRIVIA: 90% of managers say their company does a fantastic job with this; only 30% of workers agree. (Employee recognition)

TRIVIA: The first male in this profession started in 1922; the first female in this profession started in 1930. (Flight attendant)

TIME COP

It’s time for you to play time cop and catch which of the following events did NOT happen in 2010:

• The Deepwater Horizon oil drilling platform exploded in the Gulf of Mexico, killing 11 workers.

• After a big controversy over the Tonight Show timeslot Conan O’Brien hosted his last episode of the show.

• Inception and Iron Man 2 were in theaters.

• YouTube went online. (2005)

• Prince William and Kate Middleton were engaged.

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JOKE OF THE DAY

(CAUTION) Two residents of an old folk’s home were sitting alone in the lobby one evening. The old man looked over and said to the old lady, “I know just what you’re wanting. For $5.00 I’ll have sex with you right over there in that rocking chair.” The old lady looked surprised but didn’t say a word. The old man continued, “For $10 I’ll do it with you on that nice soft sofa over there.” She flushed a bit, but still said nothing. “But for $20,” he finally said, “I’ll take you back to my room, light some candles, and give you the most romantic evening you’ve ever had in your life.” She still didn’t say anything, so the man kept quiet. But after a couple minutes she started digging into her purse. She pulled out a wrinkled $20 bill and held it up toward the man. “So,” the man says with a grin, “you want the nice romantic evening in my room!” “Get serious,” she snapped. “What do I need romance for at my age? Give me four times in the rocker!”

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VIDEO OF THE DAY

Toddler struggling to pick up tennis balls.

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IMAGE OF THE DAY

Mr. Pepper.

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LAST MINUTE ITEMS

• Write in a more polite, friendly tone.

• A new fact every minute.

• Mark Davis worked at a Kmart in Naperville, Illinois in the late 1980s and early 1990s. Each month, the corporate office mailed a cassette tape to all the stores, which contained easy-listening elevator music and in-house advertisements. Davis saved all 56 cassettes.

• Paste any YouTube link and it speeds it up 2x to the tune of the Benny Hill theme song.

• How fit are you really?

• How to make your Facebook profile picture into a looping video.

• Get stats about any Instagram account, including yours.

• September’s Best News Bloopers.

• Is your computer powered up?

• The treadmill’s dark and twisted past.

• Finally the answer to, What should we watch tonight?

• Write a letter to your future self.

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COUNTRY DATEBOOK: OCTOBER 15, 2015

• 1960: LORETTA LYNN made her debut performance on the Grand Ole Opry.

• 1969: GENE AUTRY was inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame.

• 1973: PATSY CLINE and CHET ATKINS were inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame.

• 1975: The Grand Ole Opry celebrated its 50th anniversary.

• 1988: Streets of Bakersfield, DWIGHT YOAKAM’s duet with BUCK OWENS, topped the charts.

• 1994: BROOKS & DUNN topped the charts with She’s Not The Cheatin’ Kind.

• 1999: JOHNNY RODRIQUEZ, who scored several hits in the 1970s, was acquitted of murder charges in the death of an acquaintance he mistook for a burglar in his home in Seminole, Texas.

• 2001: AARON TIPPIN’s Where The Stars & Stripes And The Eagle Fly debuted at the top of the Country Singles Sales chart.

• 2001: HAL KETCHUM announced he would not tour in support of his album Lucky Man, in honor of those who lost their lives in the September 11 terrorist attacks.

• 2007: KENNY ROGERS received the Golden Note Award from ASCAP (American Society of Composers, Artists and Producers) at their annual awards ceremony in Nashville.

• 2009: GARTH BROOKS held a press conference in Las Vegas to announce an exclusive deal with the Winn Las Vegas hotel to perform 16 weeks worth of concerts there in 2009 and 2010. That schedule would be extended deep in 2012.

• 2012: Shooting began in New York on the 2013 season of NBC’s The Celebrity Apprentice. TRACE ADKINS returned to the all-star cast, along with Bret Michaels, Gary Busey, Dennis Rodman and La Toya Jackson

Kimberly Schlapman of LITTLE BIG TOWN is 46.

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COUNTRY AUDIO: WEEK OF OCTOBER 12

» To download audio to your computer click here.

THOMAS RHETT on his song Crash and Burn.

A THOUSAND HORSES talk about their party names.

FLORIDA GEORGIA LINE on their music.

TIM McGRAW on his goal as a father.

TYLER FARR’s key to relationship happiness.

Visit the Country Audio Archive for over 2,000 artist clips.

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COUNTRY MUSIC NEWS

A medical issue has forced WILLIE NELSON and MERLE HAGGARD to postpone the first three dates of their Django & Jimmie tour, which would have kicked off tonight (Thursday) in Florence, South Carolina. The medical issue is with Willie, though no details are available. The tour will now begin October 21 in Bloomington, Indiana. The three shows effected are in the process of being rescheduled.

DOLLY PARTON doesn’t have stomach cancer. In response to the Internet rumors, Dolly sent us (you) a statement Wednesday: “It is true that I had kidney stones. I had them removed three weeks ago and I am doing just fine! I am back to work and last week I was at Dollywood filming parts for my new movie ‘Coat of Many Colors,’ which premieres December 10th on NBC. With the 30th Anniversary of Dollywood, I did a full week of activities promoting my new DreamMore Resort’s opening. There is absolutely no truth at all that I have stomach cancer. I love and appreciate everyone’s concern.”

Next month KEITH URBAN will take the CMA Awards stage with John Mellencamp, the John behind his hit song John Cougar, John Deere, John 3:16. The 49th Annual CMA Awards will air live on November 4.

CHRIS YOUNG on Wednesday revealed his upcoming album’s track listing. I’m Comin’ Over is out November 13 and fans could gain access to the album titles before anyone else by tweeting a message that unlocked the title list.

FAITH HILL and KELLIE PICKLER will team for a new talk show about lifestyle, gardening, cooking and other topics. Filming will take place in Nashville with Kellie serving as co-host with one or two other people and Faith executive producing the show with her manager, Jason Owen, and Lisa Erspamer, former co-executive producer of the Oprah Winfrey Show. Faith will make an occasional appearance as will other country artists from time to time, but the show won’t be specifically about country music. Plans are to shop the show next year to daytime syndication and have it begin airing either late in 2016 or early 2017.

BROOKS & DUNN and REBA MCENTIRE have extended their Las Vegas residency into 2016 with the addition of six dates.

TRISHA YEARWOOD, a lifelong Elvis Presley fan, will flip the switch at Graceland in Memphis on November 20 to usher in the 2015 holiday season.

GARTH BROOKS is bringing his world tour to Wichita, Kansas. The December 4-5 concerts go on sale October 23.

CARRIE UNDERWOOD, GARTH BROOKS, Tony Bennett, Adam Levine and Usher will be among the artists honoring the late Frank Sinatra as part of the CBS special Sinatra 100 airing December 6. The show will salute what would have been Sinatra’s 100th birthday.

MARTINA MCBRIDE, CASSADEE POPE and RAELYNN were in New York yesterday (Wednesday) to perform at the Pandora Presents Women of Country event to benefit breast cancer awareness and the T.J. Martell Foundation.

BRAD PAISLEY tells Car & Driver magazine he once outran a speeding ticket. Seems when Brad was in college in West Virginia, he was on a mountain road one day going around 80 in a 45 zone when a police car pulled up beside him and turned on the lights. Brad hit the gas and sped off going about 90, eventually hitting the breaks at a corner and pulling into a driveway and shutting off his lights. Within 30 seconds, the cop car flew by with lights flashing and pulled over someone else.