INTERPREP ★ AUGUST 22, 2016

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DATEBOOK: AUGUST 22, 2016

This is day 235 of 2016. There are 131 days remaining.

BIRTHDAYS

• Valerie Harper (The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Rhoda) is 77

• Former football coach Bill Parcells is 75

• TV journalist Steve Kroft is 71

• Cindy Williams (Laverne & Shirley) is 69

• Ty Burrell (Modern Family) is 49

• TV chef Giada De Laurentiis is 46

• Howie Dorough of the Backstreet Boys is 43

• Kristen Wiig (Bridesmaids, SNL, Ghostbusters) is 43

• The Late Late Show host James Corden is 38

IT HAPPENED TODAY

• 1902: President Theodore Roosevelt became the first U.S. chief executive to ride in an automobile, in Hartford, Connecticut.

• 1956: President Dwight D. Eisenhower and Vice President Richard M. Nixon were nominated for second terms by the Republican National Convention in San Francisco.

• 1986: Kerr-McGee Corp. agreed to pay the estate of the late Karen Silkwood $1.38 million, settling a 10-year-old nuclear contamination lawsuit.

• 2003: Alabama’s chief justice, Roy Moore, was suspended for his refusal to obey a federal court order to remove his Ten Commandments monument from the rotunda of his courthouse.

• 2003: In Oslo, Norway, an Elvis impersonator set a world record by singing the King’s hits non-stop for 26 hours, four minutes and 40 seconds.

• 2005: A pilot going from Ireland to France flew this plane for two hours before realizing nearly half of a wing had been ripped away just after take-off. Incredibly he managed to land safely, despite the 5-foot, 7-inch chunk and a fuel tank being missing.

• 2007: The Storm botnet, a botnet created by the Storm Worm, sent out a record 57 million emails in one day.

• 2015: Giant panda Mei Xiang gave birth to twin cubs at the Smithsonian National Zoo in Washington, D.C.

SPECIAL EVENTS

• Be An Angel Day

• Take Your Cat To The Vet Day

• Eat a Peach Day

UPCOMING

• August 27: College football begins

• September 5: Labor Day

• September 8: NFL season begins

• October 12: Columbus Day

• October 31: Halloween

• November 8: Presidential Election

More holidays


NUMBER FOR THE DAY

90: Albums released by Dolly Parton. Her latest was released August 19.


NEWS ATTACK!

A 93-year-old World War II veteran completed his three-year run across the United States. [The nursing home was relieved to find out what happened to him.]

A 93-year-old World War II veteran completed his three-year run across the United States. [We know that they were the greatest generation ever, but does he have to rub it in?]

A 93-year-old World War II veteran completed his three-year run across the United States. [Donald Trump said that a real war hero wouldn’t have needed three years.]

A U. S. sailor has been sentenced to prison for taking pictures of the highly classified areas of his nuclear submarine. He said that he only took the pictures so that he could one day show his future children what their daddy did while in the Navy. [What a waste of time. No kid could possibly care less what his dad did for a living.]

Did you know that this Olympiad saw the first same-sex married couple win a gold medal? They were part of Great Britain women’s field hockey team. [No married couple of any kind will ever win for canoeing because you can seldom get both rowing in the same direction.]

China opened a glass-bottomed bridge over a canyon. [Meanwhile, down below was the opening ceremony of the world’s largest international convention of perverts.]

A store clerk in New Jersey sneaked out the back and pulled down the store’s security gates to lock two armed robbers inside. [It was like capturing real life Pokemon.]

Did you watch the Rio Olympics closing ceremonies? [It was delayed by several hours after the entire international roster of athletes was held at gunpoint.]

The latest research shows that our immune systems are stronger in the morning. [I need a strong immune system just to be able to look at myself in the mirror in the morning.]

Police in Massachusetts looking for a young 31-year-old fugitive found him disguised as an old man. [What exactly is Ryan Lochte’s problem?]

Ryan Lochte has hired the same public relations guy used by Alec Baldwin and Justin Bieber. [Wow. He just keeps on making mistakes, doesn’t he?]


NEWS & NUGGETS

LOCHTE WILL FACE FURTHER ACTION FROM OLYMPIC COMMITTEE _ ( AUDIO) The U.S. Olympic Committee is not too happy with Ryan Lochte. CEO Scott Blackmun told NBC News that “further action” is coming after the 32-year-old swimmer admitted to being intoxicated and exaggerating what he called a “robbery” at a gas station during the 2016 Rio Summer Olympics.

U.S. MEN’S BASKETBALL TRIUMPHS OVER SERBIA _ The U.S. men’s basketball team won their third gold medal — and 25th straight Olympic win — on Sunday against Serbia during the final day of the 2016 Rio Games. Team U.S.A. had a bit of a slow start in the Olympics, but they rallied for their final match, easily triumphing over Serbia, 96-66.

… The win also marks a victory for Carmelo Anthony, who became the first American man to win three straight gold medals in basketball.

MICHAEL PHELPS DROPPED $2.5 MIL ON NEW MANSION _ Michael Phelps has dropped $2.5 million on a huge mansion in Scottsdale, Arizona. It’s super private — with 5 bedrooms, 6.5 baths and a pool that looks like it’s straight out of a 5 star resort. Phelps had been training at Arizona State University in nearby Tempe — and has said he plans to help coach the college swim team now that his Olympic career is over. The 31-year-old reportedly sold his home in Baltimore.

NEIGHBORS SCRUB HATE MESSAGES BEFORE FAMILY SEES THEM _ When the Phillips family was camping in the mountains over the weekend, vandals spray-painted vulgar and racist messages on their Washington house and truck, complete with the N-word and the letters ‘KKK.’ Neighbor Heidi Russell says the messages made her want to cry. So she and other neighbors decided to throw a painting party. They brought together dozens of families from small-town Tenino armed with paint and other supplies to erase the messages of hate and replace them with love. Even the town’s on-duty police officer stopped by to paint. After a full morning of painting, the neighbors erased nearly all the visible signs of the vulgar messages.

STRANGERS TURN UP AT FUNERAL FOR WOMAN WITH NO FAMILY _ When Ora Weinbach heard her father, a rabbi, was officiating an elderly woman’s funeral service that no one planned to attend, her heart sank. The New Jersey high school teacher turned to her Facebook page, asking for others to join her at the service. The response was immediate. On Wednesday, about 30 people wound up attending the graveside funeral for Francine Stein, although they didn’t know that was her name. The strangers didn’t know much about her, but they knew she deserved a suitable funeral, especially so they could adhere to Jewish tradition. They required 10 men to recite a prayer called the Kaddish.

DOGS MAY LIKE PRAISE AS MUCH AS THEIR TREATS _ Scientists who’ve trained the first group of dogs to sit still in MRI machines so that their brain activity can be measured say they’ve made a striking discovery: Dogs may like to get attention as much as if not more than they like to get treats. The researchers (reporting in the journal Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience) they say their small experiments lay the groundwork for deeper questions about how canines experience the world. One theory about dogs is that they are primarily Pavlovian machines: They just want food and their owners are simply the means to get it. Another, more current, view of their behavior is that dogs value human contact in and of itself.

… Researchers trained 15 dogs to associate a pink truck with food, a blue toy knight with verbal praise, and a hairbrush with no reward. Over 32 trials they found that all dogs preferred a reward to none, nine responded to both, four preferred the blue toy knight, and just two preferred the pink truck that meant food.

RACIST COUPLE DIDN’T LEAVE A TIP BECAUSE THEY “ONLY TIP CITIZENS” _ The word “citizen” has been injected with new meaning since the rise of Donald Trump and his promises to build a wall — a great wall, it’s gonna be so great! — and kick all illegal immigrants out of the country. Sadly, “not a citizen” has become a catch-all for any person who looks vaguely non-white. And now, apparently, it’s also an excuse to be cheap and not tip a waitress. A couple dining at Jess’ Lunch in Harrisonburg, Virginia, stiffed their waitress, 18-year-old Sadie Elledge, because she is Latina. Elledge, who was born in America and is a citizen, showed the receipt to her grandfather who posted it on Facebook. From there, it went viral.

… On the credit card bill, where the tip is usually entered by a customer, the couple wrote, “We only tip citizens.” • IMAGE

WAITER TIPPED $500 FOR ACT OF KINDNESS _ A customer at a Dallas-area Applebee’s restaurant left Kasey Simmons an unforgettable tip. The customer ordered the cheapest thing on the menu — flavored water. Total bill was 37-cents. The tip: $500. And it came with a note on a napkin.

… What did the note say? Well a day earlier, Simmons was shopping at his local grocery store. In the checkout line, he noticed another shopper, an older woman who was clearly despondent. Other shoppers passed right by her. Simmons did not. He spoke to the woman. She didn’t explain why she was sad, but Simmons lifted her spirits and even paid for her groceries. It was just $17 but, as Simmons pointed out, “It’s about showing someone you care.” The tip at the restaurant apparently came from the woman’s grateful daughter. The note on the napkin described the mother’s anguish as she tried to go about her normal activities on what was the third anniversary of her husband’s death.

INFANT TRIPLETS NEARLY BREAK WORLD RECORD FOR SIZE _ A set of Tennessee triplets has nearly broke the world record for being the largest ever born. Stella, Jack and Luke Tipton were just two pounds shy of breaking the world record when they were born five months ago, weighing almost 20 pounds together. Their mother, Kate, made it 34 weeks before giving the University of Tennessee Medical Center the largest triplets ever recorded at the hospital. Triplets are typically around 3 pounds each at birth. Jack weighed 7 pounds 4 ounces, Stella was 6 pounds 3 ounces, and Luke weighed 5 pounds 9 ounces.

… The largest triplets ever recorded were born in 2004 in California at a combined 22 pounds.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAWYERS SCORE $4.6M IN FEES _ The lawyers who helped bring the song Happy Birthday into the public domain will be handsomely rewarded. A judge awarded the legal team $4.6 million after last year’s successful copyright lawsuit. The money will come out of a $14 million class-action settlement being paid by music publisher Warner/Chappell. In the case, documentary filmmaker Jennifer Nelson sued the company after it charged her a $1,500 licensing fee for including the song in her film about its origins. A federal judge ultimately concluded that Warner/Chappell’s claim on the copyright of the famous tune was dubious.

MEN WILL BE BILLED $37 MILLION FOR STARTING OREGON WILDFIRE _ Two men blamed for starting a fire in Oregon last year will be billed $37 million, the amount it cost to put the fire out. Officials want Dominic Decarlo, 70, and Cloyd Deardoff, 64, to pay back the government for the Stouts Creek wildfire, which started July 30, 2015 and destroyed 25,000 acres. Investigators discovered the men’s lawnmowers were the cause of the fire — at the time, people were barred from mowing lawns between 10AM and 8PM due to fire restrictions. The Stouts Creek fire started in the afternoon.


WACKY-BUT-TRUE

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: WOMAN WHO MISSED BUS IS CHARGED WITH STEALING AMBULANCE _ A woman who missed the last bus for the night is accused of stealing an ambulance to get home from a hospital in Ohio. The woman was arrested after a short pursuit.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: ANGRY MAN THROWS PIZZA AND PUNCHES AT POLICE STATION _ A Pennsylvania drunken driving suspect upset that his vehicle was still impounded a week after his arrest threw pizza and punches at police.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: SON TRIES TO FIX DAD’S BROKEN ARM WITH DRAMATIC TWIST _ A young man in China thought resetting his father’s broken arm would be, like on TV, a snap. Instead, he put his dad in the hospital with compound breaks. The unfortunate father was playing a game of basketball with his son when he fell while attempting a slam dunk and injured his left arm. From the pain, the man assumed it was broken and figured it would heal just “fine if the bone was set correctly.” That’s when the man’s 20-year-old son decided to take a crack at it. Taking a lesson from doctors in his favorite TV shows, the son braced himself and jerked dad’s injured arm with one swift motion. Predictably, the dramatic twist landed dad in a hospital.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: SURGEONS SAVE MAN WITH TASTE FOR METAL KNIVES _ Doctors in India were perplexed over what was ailing a 42-year-old man after he showed up at a hospital complaining of abdominal pains. We they gave him an ultrasound they found some ‘solid mass in his stomach’ which looked like cancer tumors. After a five-hour procedure, doctors were amazed to instead find a total 40 folding knives. The man told the doctors that he liked the taste of the knives and had been eating them for about two months.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: COURT ORDERS YOUNG MAN TO GO FISHING _ A court in the Maldives has released a young man arrested on charges of assault on the condition that he goes fishing to earn an income and attends prayers at the island mosque. The 19-year-old was arrested for his alleged involvement in a gang fight.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: WOMAN WHO DROP-KICKED SON’S CAKE FACES CHARGE OVER ICE CREAM ASSAULT _ A Michigan women who made headlines for allegedly drop-kicking her son’s birthday cake at a bakery has been handed a new charge. Earlier this year Tricia Ann Kortes landed in the news for kicking a Superman v Batman birthday cake at a grocery story because she was unhappy with how the cake turned out. Now she’s appeared in court on charges of assault and battery over an incident last summer at an ice cream place. She’s seen on video striking an employee on the head because they didn’t have her favorite flavor.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: DRIVER CRASHES MERCEDES DURING TEST DRIVE _ A person test-driving a Mercedes struck other cars in the parking lot and crashed the test vehicle. The driver hit the gas and accelerated at a high rate of speed, striking four vehicles in the parking lot of the dealership. She then took a sharp turn and crashed the SUV on its side.


ON TELEVISION

AMERICAN NINJA WARRIOR (8p ET, NBC) — In this new episode, the top 30 take on a more challenging course that has 10 obstacles, including the Salmon Ladder and Flying Shelf Grab.

BACHELOR IN PARADISE (8p ET, ABC) — In this new episode, two new men cause a stir among the bachelorettes.

MOM (8p ET, CBS) — Repeat

SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE (8p ET, FOX) — The Top 6 perform in this new episode and another dancer is sent home.

SUPERGIRL (8p ET, CW) — Repeat

2 BROKE GIRLS (8:30p ET, CBS) – Repeat

MOM (9p ET, CBS) — Repeat

SUPERGIRL (9p ET, CW) — Repeat

RIZZOLI AND ISLES (9p ET, TNT) — In this new episode, a mortician’s body is found in one of his own funeral home’s caskets. Colin Egglesfield returns as Tommy

SERIES PREMIERE: TOO CLOSE TO HOME (9p ET, TLC) — This new 8-part drama (from Tyler Perry and the first scripted show for TLC) tells the story of a young woman who is forced to return to her humble beginnings after a scandal ruins her political career. Danielle Savre stars, with Heather Locklear and Matt Battaglia as guest stars.

THE ODD COUPLE (9:30p ET, CBS) — Repeat

SCORPION (10p ET, CBS) — Repeat

RUNNING WILD WITH BEAR GRYLLS (10p ET, NBC) — Courteney Cox (Friends, Cougar Town) joins Bear on the windswept coast of Ireland in this new episode.

MISTRESSES (10p ET, ABC) — In this new episode, Lydia tries to sabotage Karen and Adam’s relationship.

MAJOR CRIMES (10p ET, TNT) — Major Crimes investigates a divorce attorney with a lot of angry clients in this new episode.

SERIES PREMIERE: CHEER SQUAD (10p ET, Freeform) — This new reality series looks at the world of high-stakes competitive cheerleading as it follows the Great White Sharks, a celebrated team from Canada, through an intense season.


ENTERTAINMENT

SUICIDE SQUAD STAYS ON TOP FOR THIRD WEEK _ A big-budget remake of Ben-Hur was trampled at the box office over the weekend. The $100 million movie debuted with just $11.4 million. The DC Comics supervillain film Suicide Squad held the top spot for the third straight week with an estimated $20.7 million.

SUICIDE SQUAD PASSES HALF BILLION WORLDWIDE _ While Suicide Squad made just $20 million in North America over the weekend — enough to stay on top for a third week — the DC Films supervillain caper was able to push past the half billion mark over the last week. While mostly hated by critics, Suicide Squad has now made $570 million.

RIHANNA CONFIRMS PLANS TO RELEASE A NINTH STUDIO ALBUM _ Rihanna may have just wrapped her Anti World Tour in Europe but the singer is already busy working on some new music for her ninth studio album — and we could see it before the end of the year. Her latest album, Anti, was released just eight months ago.

ANGELINA JOLIE DEAD IS NOT DEAD _ Angelina Jolie is most definitely not dead, but anyone browsing social media over the weekend may have seen viral reports that stated otherwise. The stories — appearing to come from CNN and ABC — included links that actually opens to a page that steals personal info. For the record, Jolie is very much alive.

TV SHOW COPS IS GETTING TURNED INTO A MOVIE _ We all know the long-running FOX TV show COPS. Now it’s being turned into a movie. The idea behind the COPS movie is to take the vibe of the reality documentary series and turn it into an “edgy narrative feature with a buddy comedy bent on the order of a Lethal Weapon.” • COPS THEME

LEONARDO DICAPRIO BACKS OUT OF CLINTON FUNDRAISER _ Leonardo DiCaprio has dropped out of hosting a Tuesday fundraiser for Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton at his Hollywood Hills home. According to The Hollywood Reporter the $33,400-per-guest event, part of a series of late-August fundraisers for Clinton in Los Angeles, now will be held at the nearby residence of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel.

… An unidentified source close to the event told People the reason DiCaprio backed out was work-related — that his current project will keep him in New York until Wednesday.

LEONARDO DICAPRIO AND GIRLFRIEND FINE AFTER CAR CRASH _ Leonardo DiCaprio and his girlfriend were involved in a car accident on Saturday in the Hamptons. A source close to the actor confirms that “all are doing great” after the minor fender-bender.

LUKE SKYWALKER HELPS DYING STAR WARS FAN WITH WISH _ #RogueOneWish is a Twitter hashtag that’s gaining steam, designed to help terminal cancer patient Neil Hanvey see the upcoming Lucasfilm movie before his time runs out. A Star Wars superfan and illustrator, 36-year-old Hanvey was told in April that he had eight months to live, roughly the same amount of time until Rogue One: A Star Wars Story is set for its worldwide release in mid-December.

… Now fans — and also Star Wars veteran Mark Hamill – are helping Hanvey’s cause to see the movie before it’s too late. Just two days ago, Hamill retweeted a story about the campaign to his 1.2 million followers:

… Last year J.J. Abrams granted Daniel Fleetwood’s wish to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens before he passed away. And big Batman fan Barry Henderson got to see Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice after director Zack Snyder helped out.

BARBRA STREISAND ASKS APPLE TO CHANGE SIRI’S PRONUNCIATION _ Barbra Streisand isn’t a big fan of how Siri says her name. The 72-year-old entertainer actually called up Apple to have them change it to the correct pronunciation. Barbra says it’s “Streisand with a soft S, like sand on the beach.” Apple CEO Tim Cook agreed to have Siri change the pronunciation of her name with the next update on September 30.

BILL MURRAY STEALS A MAN’S FRIES AND GETS AWAY WITH IT _ Bill Murray can literally get away with anything. While at Martha’s Vineyard Airport, Reddit user sonowthatimhere posted some pictures of the comedy legend casually stealing their friend’s French fries. Murray was apparently dropping off some friends at the airport and their flight was delayed, so they decided to grab a bite to eat.


AUDIO

ON THE PRO AUDIO PAGE…

• PHONER: Weird thing you hit with your car.

• AL ROKER: Al is an Internet hero after calling Ryan Lochte a liar Friday.

• TURD TORNADO: CNN interviewer says Turd Tornado. → See Entertainment August 19.

• KIDS: Kids saying who they want to be President. → From the archives but a lot more topical now.


INTERPREP PROSHARE


BITS & BREAKS

TOP TEN MOVIES

  1. Suicide Squad, $20.7 million
  2. Sausage Party, $15.3 million
  3. War Dogs, $14.3 million
  4. Kubo and the Two Strings, $12.6 million
  5. Ben-Hur, $11.35 million
  6. Pete’s Dragon, $11.3 million
  7. Bad Moms, $8 million
  8. Jason Bourne, $7.9 million
  9. The Secret Life of Pets, $5.7 million
  10. Florence Foster Jenkins, $4.3 million

… One year ago this week the number one movie was Straight Outta Compton.

IN THEATERS FRIDAY

Mechanic: Resurrection (R) – Jason Statham, Jessica Alba, Tommy Lee Jones

Hands of Stone (R) – Robert De Niro, Ellen Barkin, John Turturro

Don’t Breathe (R) – Stephen Lang, Jane Levy, Dylan Minnette

WEEKLY HOT LIST

Courtesy of morning show talent coach Steve Reynolds. The Hot List is made up of the topics everyone knows about.

  1. Ryan Lochte
  2. Rio Olympics
  3. Closing Ceremonies
  4. Donald Trump
  5. Presidential Election
  6. Back to School
  7. Extreme Vetting
  8. Zika Virus
  9. Louisiana Flooding
  10. Simone Biles
  11. Johnny Depp Divorce
  12. NFL Pre-Season
  13. Frank Ocean
  14. Usain Bolt
  15. Pokemon Go
  16. College Football

DOWNLOAD THIS APP!

The FBI released a new app making it easier for the public — as well as financial institutions, law enforcement agencies, and others — to view photos and information about bank robberies in different geographic areas of the country.

The FBI’s new FBI Bank Robbers app runs on both Android and iOS and lets users sort bank robberies by the date they occurred, the category they fall under (like armed serial bank robber), the FBI field office working the case, or the state where the robbery occurred.

… The app ties into BankRobbers.fbi.gov, which overlays FBI information about bank robberies onto Google Maps.

… The app’s users “can also select push notifications to be informed when a bank robbery has taken place near their location.

LINKS: iOS | Android

BARTENDER MYTHS

Imagine a job where you could roll into work at 9pm, pour drinks, drink said drinks, listen to music, dance, party and flirt. Such is the perceived life of a bartender. But let’s separate fact from fiction.

• Myth: Bartenders have the best job — While all of us are drinking and having fun, they’re working. It is, after all a job. If it was all fun and games, they’d call it something else. And, after we’re sitting comfortably at Denny’s working on a holding off a hangover with a grand slam breakfasts, the bartender is most likely wiping down bottles, cleaning floor grates and counting money with one eye.

• Myth: Bartenders need to earn tips — They don’t… they need to earn GOOD tips. Tipping a dollar per drink is your obligation by virtue of stepping through the door and walking up to the bar. Everybody should be prepared to do it.

• Myth: Whistling to get a bartender’s attention is appropriate. — Are you going to fill their food bowl and play fetch with them, too? Really, there’s no better way to ensure that you won’t get a drink. If you need to get their attention, make eye contact or raise your hand slightly.

• Myth: You’re smarter than the bartender — You’re not. Probably 90 percent of bartenders have college degrees or master’s degrees and can most likely whoop your butt at Jeopardy. Also, never argue your tab — you’re drunk, they’re sober. There is no malicious force putting unwarranted drinks on your tab; if it’s on there, you drank it or bought it for somebody.

• Myth: Bartenders remember everybody’s name — They don’t. They remember drinks. If you say “Put it on my tab,” then tell them your name. Also, if a bartender asks you what you want, don’t say “another” unless you’ve been sitting at the bar and drinking the same thing for a while. If you haven’t been at the bar for a while and lift an empty glass, they have no clue what once occupied it. If they were a mind reader, it’s a sure bet they’d be in Vegas.

• Myth: Bartenders are responsible for you — If you spill a drink, clean it up. And no, the bartender is not required to give you a new one, unless they actually spilled it. If you do get a new one for free, tip. In fact, you should always tip on free drinks. If you spill a drink on the floor or break a glass, alert a staff member and they’ll clean it up. Never break a glass and just leave it on the bar.

• Myth: Bartenders want your phone number — They could wallpaper their house with all the phone numbers they’ve gotten. Never ask for a bartender’s phone number. Is their flirting going on? That’s just part of the job. If you want someone else’s phone number at the bar, the bartender will certainly help you, but keep in mind that they are neither Dr. Ruth nor Dr. Phil, and really don’t care if you score or not.

SHOWER THOUGHTS

In the shower you’re alone with no distractions. It’s just you and your thoughts. On a Reddit board called Shower Thoughts people share what things they thought of while shower.

• Micheal Phelps is a pirate. He was there to take everyone’s gold.

• An “unlimited minutes per month” phone plan really only gives you 44,640 minutes per month at best.

• What if the washer is actually the one stealing socks and we’ve been wrongfully blaming the drier all of this time?

• A single piece of corn is technically a unicorn.

• Considering he lives at the north pole, it seems more likely Santa Claus would come down here for supplies rather than to give things to us.

• Usain Bolt spent his whole life training and preparing for the 114 seconds he spent in races winning Olympic gold medals.

• If you aren’t at least a little ashamed of your country’s history, you don’t know your country’s history.


FUN & GAMES

TRIVIA: Almost 200 billion of these are produced in the world each year. (Canned goods)

TOUCH-TONE TRIVIA

This is a quick, fun contest that a listener can’t lose. After you ask each question the caller presses their telephone. Since you won’t be able to tell which number is pressed, you yell out the correct number on every one, assuring your listener of an easy victory.

Q1: Which of the following get bigger with age:

• press 1 for feet*
• press 2 for eyes
• press 3 for chine

Q2: What percentage of Americans think it’s OK to cheat on taxes?

• press 1 for 17%*
• press 2 for 27%
• press 3 for 37%

Q3: How much money is lost every hour at Las Vegas casinos?

• press 1 for $55,000
• press 2 for $1.1 million*
• press 3 for $1.2 billion

Q4: How many zoos (accredited) are there in the U.S.?

• press 1 for 142*
• press 2 for 1,200
• press 3 for 8,050


VIDEO OF THE DAY

Watch bowling balls plummet to their demise.


IMAGE OF THE DAY


DATEBOOK: AUGUST 23, 2016

This is day 236 of 2016. There are 130 days remaining.

BIRTHDAYS

• Barbara Eden (I Dream of Jeannie) is 85

• Richard Sanders (Les Nessman on WKRP In Cincinnati) is 76

• David Robb (Downton Abbey) is 69

• Shelley Long (Cheers) is 67

• Singer/actor Rick Springfield is 67

• Jay Mohr (Jerry Maguire, The Incredible Burt Wonderstone) is 46

• Scott Caan (Hawaii Five-O) is 40

• Former NBA star Kobe Bryant is 38

• Joanne Froggatt (Anna, the head housemaid on Downton Abbey) is 36

IT HAPPENED TODAY

• 1784: Eastern Tennessee declared itself an independent state under the name of Franklin. The step was rejected by the United States Congress one year later.

• 1904: The automobile tire chain was patented.

• 1958: Knighty Knight Bugs was released; it became the first Bugs Bunny cartoon to win an Academy Award.

• 1968: Ringo Starr temporarily quit The Beatles.

• 1991: In Lansing, Michigan, 250 gerbils chewed their way out of shipping boxes and scampered though the airport.

• 1999: Berlin once again became the capital of Germany.

• 2000: Richard Hatch was the winning castaway on the TV show “Survivor.” Hatch won $1 million for his stay on the island of Pulau Tida in the South China Sea.

• 2003: A 47-year-old German man lost his driver’s license after failing to perform any of the required actions on an alcohol test. The test was noteworthy because the man’s dog executed all the commands perfectly, including a 360-degree turn as his master staggered and fell.

• 2008: Microsoft announced it was partnering with Rock the Vote to let people register to vote through Xbox 360 game systems.

• 2010: Heavy winds knocked down the Anne Frank tree in Amsterdam.

• 2012: Lance Armstrong, the seven-time Tour de France winner, announced he would not contest the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency charges of doping, a result of which would include being stripped of all of his Tour de France victories.

SPECIAL EVENTS

•  Day For The Remembrance of The Slave Trade & Its Abolition

• Ride the Wind Day (skydiving)

• Cuban Sandwich Day

UPCOMING

• August 27: College football begins

• September 5: Labor Day

• September 8: NFL season begins

• October 12: Columbus Day

• October 31: Halloween

• November 8: Presidential Election

More holidays