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• Glenn Close is 72

• Bruce Willis is 64


•  1831: The City Bank of New York became the site of the first bank robbery in United States history. $245,000 was taken. Edward Smith was caught, convicted and spent five years in prison.

• 1918: The U.S. Congress established time zones and approved Daylight Saving Time.

• 1953: The Academy Awards ceremony was televised for the first time with proceedings in Hollywood and New York. The Greatest Show on Earth was named best picture of 1952.

• 1957: Elvis Presley bought his Graceland estate in Memphis.

• 1988: Michael Jackson bought a ranch near Santa Ynez, California, and built his own personal zoo and amusement park. He named it Neverland.

• 1995: A 34-year-old London man was sentenced to a year in jail for dividing up he and his wife’s property in a divorce settlement. He did it with a chainsaw. He divided up the furniture and the front porch.

• 2002: Seven brothers married seven sisters at the same wedding ceremony in Pakistan. Over 2,000 family members attended the mass wedding.

• 2013: NASA’s Mars rover Curiosity discovered further evidence of water-bearing minerals.


• Certified Nurses Day

• Oatmeal Cookie Day


• March 19: March Madness: Men’s First Four
• March 20: First Day of Spring (5:58 PM ET)
• March 20: Snowman Burning
• March 23: Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards
• March 28: March Madness: Men’s Sweet 16 begins
• March 29: Brexit
• April 1: April Fools’ Day (Monday)
• April 6: March Madness: Men’s Final Four
• April 11: The Masters
• April 12: Coachella
• April 14: Game of Thrones final season premiere
• April 14: Palm Sunday
• April 15: Tax deadline day
• April 21: Easter
• April 22: Earth Day
• May 5: Cinco de Mayo
• May 27: Cooper’s Hill Cheese Rolling
• July 5-6: World Wife Carrying Championship
• August 2: Sturgis Motorcycle Rally begins


14,461: Consecutive days surfed by world record holder Dale Webster. He started September 2, 1975 and ended after October 5, 2015.


In college basketball, March Madness starts today (Tuesday) with 68 competitors. [It would have been 69, but Joe Biden won’t tell us if he’s in or not.]

The Japanese space agency announced that next month it will drop an explosive onto the moon to create a crater. [What’s wrong, aren’t the moon’s other five million craters good enough?]

A drunken passenger aboard a high-speed train in Germany broke down the door of the driver’s cab and demanded that he reduce the train’s speed. [He was arrested and taken to jail… very slowly.]

Indonesia will open its first subway line later this month. The goal is to lower traffic. [And increase graffiti.]

Authorities in New Jersey intercepted a million pounds of pork smuggled from China. [Someone squealed.]

A Florida man was arrested for throwing pancake mix at a woman. [He was charged with assault and batter.]

The government will give you $1,000 if you adopt a wild horse. [I wouldn’t mind adopting, but I want one that’s already out of diapers.]

Captain Marvel had another great week at the box office. [Lori Loughlin is already bribing producers to put her daughters in the sequel.]

NASA is having trouble finding anyone who witnessed a meteor explosion a few months ago. [Hey, if it wasn’t trending on Instagram, you can forget about it.]

In upstate New York, a deer had to be rescued after it got its antlers caught in a soccer net. [Sadly, it happens every St. Patrick’s Day.]


TO HAVE A 2020 BABY, CONCEIVE NOW? _ Want to have a child with a birthday of January 1, 2020? Some say tomorrow (Wednesday) is the day to conceive. Still others say it’s March 28. And some say April 9.

A 70-POUND BELL AT AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL GOES MISSING _ A 70-pound bronze bell that was located above the main entrance to McLane Elementary School in Olympia, Washington, was stolen. The suspect pulled up to the school in a truck about 4:20 AM, used a ladder and spent the next 30 minutes removing the bell. Video of the theft doesn’t provide a clear image of the suspect or vehicle. The bell has an estimated value of $2,000.

SURVEY REVEALS WHAT WE’D DO WITH EXTRA TIME ON OUR HANDS _ If you had extra time on hour hands, what would you do with it? Say you only had to work a 6-hour work day, or four days a week instead of five. Would you use the extra time to start a side business, volunteer, or do some mentoring or tutoring? If you said “yes” you probably wouldn’t. In a survey of almost 3,000 full time workers, almost half said their extra time would be “spent with family.” Right behind this is travel more, followed by exercise, spending time with friends, pursing hobbies, and sleep more.

TOILETS WILL SCAN YOUR POOP TO DIAGNOSE YOUR AILMENTS _ Smart toilets that’ll scan your poop using artificial intelligence will one day save you a trip to the doctor. That’s what the chief executive of memory chipmaker Micron Technology says is coming when the use of artificial intelligence. Sanjay Mehrotra said at a recent conference, “Imagine smart toilets in the future that will be analyzing human waste in real time every day. You don’t need to be going to visit a physician every six months. If any sign of disease starts showing up, you’ll be able to catch it much faster because of urine analysis and stool analysis.”

71 PERCENT OF US ARE SCARED TO RIDE IN SELF-DRIVING _ After decades of hype around self-driving cars, technological advancements are close to making the age of autonomous vehicles a reality. However, a recent survey conducted by AAA found that nearly three in four Americans are afraid of using the self-driving technology.

… Researchers found that 53 percent of people are comfortable with low-speed, short-distance forms of automated transportation, and 44 percent are comfortable with self-driving vehicles for delivery services. Yet, only 20 percent of respondents said they were comfortable with self-driving cars transporting their loved ones.

… One problem self-driving car manufacturers need to fix: pedestrian deaths. The rate for autonomous cars is now 1 death for 3 million passenger miles, while the rate for non-autonomous cars is 1 for every 100 million passenger miles.

SPRINKLE RAMEN POWDER ON FRENCH FRIES _ Here’s an interesting food combination people are praising: dusting your McDonald’s french fries with the ramen powder that comes with your Top Ramen.

PEOPLE ARE PUTTING MUSTARD ON THE PB&J SANDWICHES _ People on the Twitter are screwing up peanut butter and jelly sandwiches by putting mustard on top. Not inside — ON TOP. They make the PB&J as one normally would, then squirt some mustard on the top piece of bread. • IMAGE

HOUSEHOLD CHORES SHOULD BE SPLIT 45 / 45 / 10 _ There’s no such thing as a “50-50” household when it comes to splitting chores. A survey finds fifty percent of the work is too much of a load for both husbands and wives. Ideally, each would do about 45% of the housework. The rest, says researcher Chloe Bird, should be done by children, other family members or a maid, if you can afford one. According to the study, women claim to clean 70% of the house, while men claim they do 42% of the work.

ROBOT DRIVING COACHES ‘NICER’ THAN REAL ONES _ Students at a driving school in China say newly installed robotic coaches have eliminated some of the stress they experienced when practicing with a human coach. The robotic coach, which provides automatic voice navigation, gives learners gentle voice commands.

‘HEALTHY’ WOMAN ALMOST KILLS HERSELF WITH FRUIT CONCOCTION _ A woman in China who thought she could more fully absorb the nutrients in fresh fruit almost died after she injected juice directly into a vein. The 51-year-old loves folk remedies and came up with the idea of injecting juice into her body on her own. She blended around 20 fruits and after filtering them she injected the juice. Soon after she came down with a fever and itchy skin.  She didn’t tell anyone what she had done, until her husband noticed her symptoms. She was in the intensive care unit for five days where she was treated for a severe systematic infection, coagulation disorders and dysfunction of multiple organs. She could have died from organ failure.

DNA RESEARCH MAY FINALLY UNRAVEL JACK THE RIPPER MYSTERY _ Forensic analysis by scientists in the UK may have unmasked Jack the Ripper more than a century after the murderer’s brutal killing spree sent shockwaves through Victorian London. Researchers (Liverpool John Moores University, University of Leeds) used what is, to their knowledge, the only remaining physical evidence linked to the murders, recovered from one of the Ripper’s famous victims at the scene of her death. The scientists analyzed a blood-stained shawl from Catherine Eddowes, Jack the Ripper’s fourth victim, who was killed on September 30, 1888.

… The scientists’ genetic testing linked Aaron Kosminski, a 23-year-old Polish barber living in London, to the crimes. Although identified as a Jack the Ripper suspect, police are said to have lacked sufficient evidence to charge Kosminski for the murders. Kosminski had been identified by a witness to one of the Jack the Ripper killings, although the witness refused to testify against him.

… Science Magazine reports that, while Kosminski has been linked to the horrific crimes before, this is the first time that the DNA evidence has been published in a peer-reviewed journal.

FBI’S MOST WANTED FUGITIVE CAPTURED  AFTER SIX YEARS ON THE RUN _ One of the FBI’s most wanted fugitives, Robert Brumfield, was captured and arrested in Texas on Monday — after six years on the run. Police say Brumfield, who allegedly murdered a Chase Bank employee in Louisiana and robbed an armored car to escape in 2013, was apprehended after Harris County deputies received a tip about his whereabouts. Brumfield tried to flee when deputies arrived at the home where he was said to be located but they still managed to nab him.

40 CONSECUTIVE PUSHUPS EQUALS LOWER RISK OF HEART PROBLEMS _ A recent study found that middle-aged men who are able to do 40 or more consecutive pushups have a significantly lower risk of heart problems.

6-YEAR-OLD SHAVES HEAD TO SUPPORT FRIEND BATTLING CANCER _ A 6-year-old girl in England facing cancer has the support of her grade school best friend, who let her shave his head so that they could sport matching looks as she undergoes treatment. Lulu DeVries took an electric buzzer to Oisin Ruskin’s head after he asked his parents what he could do to help his close friend, who’s battling high-risk neuroblastoma.

… Lulu has already had multiple rounds of chemotherapy, an eight-hour surgery to remove 95 percent of the tumor and is in the midst of receiving immunotherapy. The family is currently fundraising, which includes 12 marathons in 12-day effort from her father, for a chance to take Lulu to New York, where a cancer vaccine trial is underway.

NOT SURE ABOUT HAVING KIDS? PARENTHOOD-INDECISION THERAPISTS ARE HERE _ Even when couples know from the start of their marriage that they want kids, the thought of bringing a mini human into this world can be scary. Some couples are so unsure they press pause on the decision and often never have a child. Enter parenthood-indecision therapists. For $00 to $2,500 dollars, PITs will have you write down every fear, every loaded question, every disapproving comment and every panic-inducing headline that has helped to create indecision. Then the conversation begins.

iPHONE CASE TURNS YOUR PHONE INTO A DUMBBELL _ If you’re the type of guy who can’t finish off a single set of bicep curls without checking the number of likes on your last gym selfie, good news: We’ve found the perfect phone case for you. For your iPhone X, there is a case made out of a 22-pound dumbbell so you never have to stop making gains or spend a moment offline. The rig is named, appropriately, the Macho case, and it’s reportedly the heaviest phone case in the world.

… The cost is $100.

FOR BETTER SLEEP, TRY NON-ALCOHOLIC BEER _ You probably know that alcohol can wreck your sleep. Non-alcoholic beer, on the other hand, might not only help you fall asleep faster, but also sleep more soundly throughout the night. A study conducted in Spain evaluated 17 nurses’ sleep using a wrist sensor. During the control week, the women drank what they normally did before bed, and in the following two weeks they each drank one non-alcoholic beer. In those two weeks, the volunteers fell asleep an average of 12 minutes faster and they had fewer movements — less tossing and turning — during sleep. As a bonus, they also reported having less anxiety (maybe because they slept better). The researchers believe it’s the hops in the beer that act like a sedative (raising the neurotransmitter gamma-aminobutryic acid [GABA], which soothes the central nervous system). The hops also affect another neurotransmitter, serotonin, which is involved with sleep regulation and the body’s circadian rhythms.

MANY MEN SHAVE BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO _ Hey guys, would you shave each day if you didn’t have to? A study shows that 40% of all married men are influenced by their wives to shave daily. 15% of married men would shave off a beard for their mates, and 25% of single men would get rid of their beard for their girlfriend.

REMEMBER THIS? A YEAR AGO THIS WEEK: MARRIAGE WON’T MAKE YOU HAPPY _ If you want to be happy in life, it has to come from within. Getting married won’t do it. At least, that’s the word from research published by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. While newlyweds do tend to experience an initial boost of happiness, they eventually return to the same outlook they had on life before the wedding.


WACKY-BUT-TRUE: PIZZA STOLEN IN NEW ORLEANS ROBBERY _ In New Orleans, a 21-year-old woman was delivering a pizza at 2:30 in the afternoon when a man approached her and demanded the pizza. She gave it to him.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: FLIGHT WAS DIVERTED BECAUSE BATHROOMS WERE UNUSABLE _ An American Airlines flight from San Francisco to New York City was diverted to Chicago Monday because its bathrooms were unusable.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: ROBBER WITH KNIFE HAS BIGGER KNIFE PULLED ON HIM _ Police in Huntsville, Alabama, say two men in their 30s were arrested after attempting to rob a convenience store. One man entered the gas station and started to buy something, going back and forth to his car several times before pulling a large knife on the clerk and demanding cash. He tried to leave the store, but the clerk auto-locked the door and pulled a bigger knife — a machete. The employee and the attempted robber got into a knife fight, tearing up much of the store in the process. Both robbers got away, but police stopped their vehicle a short time later.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: COW RUNNING AWAY FROM POLICE GOES TO CHICK-FIL-A _ Officers with the Noblesville, Indiana, police department spent Saturday afternoon chasing a cow. At one point, the animal temporarily halted traffic before running in the direction of a Chick-Fil-A.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: TEENS WEAR MASKS TO BUY CONDOMS _ Two teenaged boys in Germany, too embarrassed to buy condoms openly, went into a gas station with stockings over their heads. After their purchase they stepped back outside only to be confronted by several policemen, who thought they were robbing the place. The boys, ages 14 and 15, were released after it became clear what was going on.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MAN TAKES OVER POLICE FREQUENCY FOR BELCH RADIO _ A Dutch man was sentenced to 20 months in jail for taking control of a police radio frequency and belching over the airwaves. The 22-year-old man was convicted of obstructing justice when he took over official frequencies with belching and disco music. In addition to jail time he also had to pay $1,900.


NCAA TOURNAMENT: FIRST FOUR (6:30p ET, TruTv) — First Four play begins in Dayton, with Prairie View A&M vs. Fairleigh Dickinson; followed by Temple vs. Belmont.

NCIS (8p ET, CBS) — Repeat

AMERICAN HOUSEWIFE (8p ET, ABC) — New. Katie does her best to support Taylor’s dreams of becoming the next American Idol.


MASTERCHEF JUNIOR (8p ET, FOX) — New. The top 20 junior home cooks take part in a bold carnival-themed competition.

THIS IS US (9p ET, NBC) — New. Kate and Toby spend time with baby Jack.

BLACKISH (9p ET, ABC) — New. Dre and Bow want to send Kyra to Valley Glen Prep.

FBI (9p ET, CBS) — Repeat

SERIES PREMIERE: MENTAL SAMURAI (9p ET, FOX) — This new quiz show, hosted by Rob Lowe, has players strap into a capsule that swings them around as they try to answer 12 questions in five minutes. The have to be perfect and finish in time to get to the next round and a chance at $100,000.

NCIS: NEW ORLEANS (10p ET, CBS) — Repeat

THE ROOKIE (10p ET, ABC) — New. Officers Chen and Bradford pull over Mario Lopez (guest starring as himself), who thinks he can talk his way out of a traffic violation.

SERIES PREMIERE: THE VILLAGE (10p ET, NBC) — This new drama revolves around the residents of Brooklyn apartment building, who support each other through life’s ups and downs. Frankie Faison, Lorraine Toussaint, Warren Christie (The Catch), and Michaela McManus (Aquarius) star.

AMY SCHUMER GROWING (Netflix) — This new stand-up special has Schumer discussing marriage and impending motherhood.


ESPN ACCIDENTALLY SPOILS NCAA WOMEN’S BRACKET _ In a surprising and massive blunder, the NCAA women’s Division I tournament bracket was released earlier than planned Monday as graphics aired on ESPNU showed all 64 teams four hours before the official selection show was scheduled to be aired on ESPN. ESPN apologized later Monday: “We deeply regret the error and extend our apology to the NCAA and the women’s basketball community. We will conduct a thorough review of our process to ensure it doesn’t happen in the future.”

EXPERIMENTAL MLB CAMERA CAPTURES UMPIRE ANGLE OF HOME RUNS _ Major League Baseball is experimenting with a new camera angle, letting fans see what the umpire sees. It recently captured two Mitch Haniger (Seattle Mariners) homers in Japan. • VIDEO

MYSPACE LOSES 12 YEARS OF MUSIC UPLOADS, AN ESTIMATED 50 MILLION SONGS _ MySpace has announced that all music uploaded to the site before 2015 has been lost. The social network admitted that an estimated 50 million songs from about 14 million artists is gone in the cyber ether. The company said, “As a result of a server migration project, any photos, video, and audio files you uploaded more than three years ago may no longer be available on or from MySpace. We apologize for the inconvenience and suggest that you retain your back up copies.”

INVISIBLE MAN REMAKE MAY ACTUALLY BE ABOUT AN INVISIBLE WOMAN _ Could the Invisible Man remake actually be The Invisible Woman? It’s possible, hints The Handmaid’s Tale star Elisabeth Moss, who has recently been reported to be attached to the upcoming horror film. With initial star Johnny Depp no longer involved with the project, Universal is reportedly looking at a new star. With Moss’ coy statement, the studio could be looking for a very different performer.

… Earlier this month, it was reported that Moss could possibly be joining the Invisible Man cast in an undisclosed role. While Moss wouldn’t directly address those rumors, the Emmy winner suggested that she could be looking at a role that’s more than just a love interest or supporting character — it could be the lead. Moss said, “… I think it’s an incredible story that maybe needs to to be retold, but maybe with a woman. I’m not saying I’m doing it. I’m just saying that theoretically that would be a great idea.”

MARK-PAUL GOSSELAAR ISN’T CRAZY ABOUT A SAVED BY THE BELL REBOOT _ There’s no escaping the role of Zack Morris. While Saved by the Bell ended all the way back in 1993, the sitcom continues to gain new viewers while maintaining loyal fans. With that in mind, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that some are wondering if the popular series could ever come back in the way of a reboot. If you ask Mark-Paul Gosselaar, he isn’t sold on the idea just yet: “Me personally, I’m okay with never seeing a reboot ever again. I like original content. I really appreciate what Rosanne has done, what Fuller House [has done] … but I’m okay with never seeing a reboot ever again.”

FILMING BEGINS DUNE ADAPTATION _ Filming has begun for the upcoming Dune reboot. The film is scheduled to shoot in three different locations which are Budapest, Hungary and Jordan. The new Dune movie will feature an all-star ensemble cast that includes Timothée Chalamet (Call Me by Your Name), Oscar Isaac (Star Wars: Episode IX), Zendaya (Spider-Man: Far From Home), Javier Bardem (No Country for Old Men), Stellan Skarsgård (Thor), Rebecca Ferguson (Mission: Impossible – Fallout), Charlotte Rampling (45 Years), Jason Momoa (Aquaman), Josh Brolin (Sicario, Avengers: Infinity War), and Dave Bautista (Avengers: Infinity War).

… Set in the distant future, Dune follows Paul Atreides, whose family assumes control of the desert planet Arrakis. As the only producer of a highly valuable resource, jurisdiction over Arrakis is contested among competing noble families. After Atreides is betrayed, he leads a rebellion to restore his family’s reign.

… Dune was previously adapted by David Lynch in 1984.

… The film is set to hit theaters on November 20, 2020.

MAMA JUNE CHARGED IN CRACK COCAINE ARREST, FACES A YEAR IN JAIL _ Mama June Shannon has officially been charged after her arrest last week, following a domestic dispute with boyfriend Geno Doak. The reality TV star has been charged with a felony for possession of a controlled substance and a misdemeanor for possession of drug paraphernalia. The controlled substance is crack cocaine, and the paraphernalia was noted by officials as showing evidence of crack cocaine residue that had been recently used. Shannon faces up to one year in jail on the felony drug charge. A date for her arraignment has not been set.

… The mother of Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson was arrested on suspicion of felony possession of a controlled substance and drug paraphernalia at an Alabama gas station Wednesday while Doak was cuffed for possession of a controlled substance and drug paraphernalia and domestic violence.


Find these audio files on the PRO AUDIO PAGE.

• PHONER: SNEAKING RESTAURANT FOOD INTO RESTAURANTS: Set up the story however you like. The phone topic is: Is it OK to sneak food from one restaurant into another? Maybe you were at a local steak restaurant and saw a mom pull a few McDonald’s hamburgers out of her bag.

• PHONER: GETTING LOST: A woman lost her boyfriend at Epcot (March 18 News & Nuggets). What’s your epic getting lost story?

• DROP: Their honesty, their integrity, and their respect.

• DROP: What happened to my clothes?




No matter how good a friend your husband is, there are some things that you simply cannot tell him — or not in so many words. That’s why the good Lord invented girlfriends. To see what we mean, check out the following scenarios.

Your Old Boyfriend Calls – An old boyfriend calls and leaves a message on your answering machine.

What you tell your husband: “That guy is such a loser.”

What you tell your best friend: Word for word what the message said (playing the actual recording, if possible), word for word what your message back to him said, plus a 20-minute reminiscence about the relationship, reliving the most romantic moments and leaving out what a cad he was.

The $270 Boots – You spend $270 on a pair of boots the day after complaining to your husband about his craft beer purchases.

What you tell your husband: “Macy’s had a sale today.”

What you tell your best friend: “The Macy’s sale had nothing, so I went to that little shoe store on Hayes Street. You know, the one where I got the amazing sandals with the sole that curves up and hugs the shape of your foot? Anyway, there were these boots that were so perfect, the kind of boots you can wear with jeans or a skirt or anything really, so you don’t even think about the price.”

His High School Girlfriend – You and your husband run into his high school girlfriend on the street.

What you tell your husband: “She’s great. I can see why you were crazy about her.”

What you tell your best friend: “He must have been crazy.”

The Head-Swivel – You are caught doing the head-swivel on a handsome guy on the street.

What you tell your husband: “Gee, he looks familiar.”

What you tell your best friend: “The most adorable man in the universe is crossing the street. Check him out! Love the hair, love the pants. Oh my God, he’s reading the same book I am! Sooo cute.”

Beauty Treatment Follow-up – You got a lunchtime peel, and your face is red and blotchy.

What you tell your husband: “I’m having a reaction to my new moisturizer.”

What you tell your best friend: Every detail of the procedure, including what it cost, which credit card you charged it on, what the dermatologist looks like, how he put his hand on your back when he ushered you out and left it there just long enough to make you wonder if he was coming on to you, what you would do about this if you weren’t married, and that she should make an appointment, seeing as she’s single and so is he.

The Blahs – You are feeling blah.

What you tell your husband: “I feel blah.”

What you tell your best friend: Every tiny thing that might be contributing to your state of blahness, each tiny little thing triggering an empathic response from your friend, who is also feeling blah lately — maybe it’s a hormonal thing — followed by a compare-and-contrast dissection of your respective blah feelings, closing with a rant about how husbands never want to listen and never understand.


Here’s a fun bit you can do in addition to whatever Wacky-But-True news feature you may already have. Cherry pick a few stories to air on Friday (or on your Saturday voice-tracked or Best Of show) and bundle them under the title “You Think You Had A Bad Week?” Choose Wacky stories that will truly make listeners realize their week, no matter how lousy, wasn’t as bad as it was for some people.


You don’t need to fly to a tropical island to get away from it all and de-stress. You can take a mental mini-vacation anytime you want. No plane ticket, packing or planning necessary. Here’s how it works:

• A study at the University of Ontario found that short term leisure activities reduce stress levels, if they’re easy to do and don’t involve competition. Do it for 15 minutes and your blood pressure will drop and your stress hormones will stop pumping.

• Change your clothes. Psychologists say changing your clothes as soon as you get home can be a powerful psychological tool. So if you wear a suit to work or a uniform, get home and change. It helps you transition from “working warrior” to “chilled out dude” instantly.

• Climb in a hammock and sip some lemonade. During the day you burn through acetylcholine, a brain chemical responsible for giving you all your brilliant ideas. Taking a small break with minimal thinking helps you bounce back and the lemonade helps replenish the brain chemical responsible for your brilliant ideas.


TRIVIA: Roughly 3,814 Americans have this in common. (They’re on the national waiting list for a heart transplant. More waiting list numbers here.)

TRIVIA: 92% of us think our employer should provide this free of charge. (Coffee)

TRIVIA: Forty-six percent of the world has this in common. (Type O blood)


The rebooted show will premiere later this year on Nickelodeon with host John Cena. Nothing to give away? Quiz a co-host, or call your mom or the station receptionist and test her.

What color do you get when you combine an equal amount of red paint with an equal amount or yellow paint?

  • orange*
  • green
  • red
  • black

True or false: Polar bears eat penguins.

  • True
  • False*

What nation has the longest border with the U.S.?

  • Alaska
  • Mexico
  • Canada*
  • South America

How many sides does a trapezoid have?

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4*

What was the name of the ship the pilgrims first took to get to the U.S.?

  • Santa Maria
  • La Nina
  • El Nino
  • The Mayflower*

Who was the first U.S. president to be impeached?

  • Bill Clinton
  • Richard Nixon
  • Andrew Johnson*
  • Thomas Jefferson

True or false: The ostrich is the fastest bird on land.

  • True*
  • False

What is the largest South American country by area?

  • Brazil*
  • Argentina
  • Chile
  • Peru



• Actor-producer Carl Reiner is 97

• Hal Linden is 88

• Hall of Fame hockey great Bobby Orr is 71

• William Hurt is 69

• Director Spike Lee is 62

• Holly Hunter is 61

• Model Kathy Ireland is 56

• Michael Rapaport (Boston Public) is 49

• Ruby Rose (Orange is the New Black) is 33


• 1916: Albert Einstein published his general theory of relativity.

• 1969: John Lennon and Yoko Ono married in Gibraltar.

• 1987: A Houston man was fined $10,000 and assessed ten years probation for stealing 76,680 rolls of toilet paper from the hospital where he worked.

• 1996: A jury in Los Angeles convicted Erik and Lyle Menendez of first-degree murder in the shotgun slayings of their millionaire parents.

• 1996: A 21-year-old Muppet fan claiming to have a bomb took over a radio station in Wanganui, New Zealand, and demanded that “Rainbow Connection” by Kermit the Frog be played non-stop for 12 hours. Police evacuated the area, decided the bomb was a fake, stormed the station, and arrested the listener. No one was hurt.

• 2016: Barack Obama became the first US President to visit Cuba since 1928.


• First Day of Spring (5:58 PM ET)

• Great American Meat Out

• International Astrology Day

• International Day of Happiness

• Kiss Your Fiancée Day

• World Storytelling Day

• Ravioli Day


• March 20: First Day of Spring (5:58 PM ET)
• March 20: Snowman Burning
• March 23: Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards
• March 28: March Madness: Men’s Sweet 16 begins
• March 29: Brexit
• April 1: April Fools’ Day (Monday)
• April 6: March Madness: Men’s Final Four
• April 11: The Masters
• April 12: Coachella
• April 14: Game of Thrones final season premiere
• April 14: Palm Sunday
• April 15: Tax deadline day
• April 21: Easter
• April 22: Earth Day
• May 5: Cinco de Mayo
• May 27: Cooper’s Hill Cheese Rolling
• July 5-6: World Wife Carrying Championship
• August 2: Sturgis Motorcycle Rally begins