• TV personality Joy Behar (The View) is 78
• John Mellencamp is 69
• Gospel singer Michael W. Smith is 63
• Simon Cowell is 61
• Omar Miller (The Unicorn, CSI: Miami) is 42
• Jake McLaughlin (Quantico) is 38
IT HAPPENED TODAY
• 1968: The Motion Picture Association of America adopted a film-rating system.
• 1982: Cats opened on Broadway. It would run for nearly 18 years before closing on September 10, 2000.
• 1996: Fox News Channel made its debut.
• 1998: Matthew Shepard, a gay college student, was beaten, robbed and left tied to a wooden fence post outside Laramie, Wyoming; he died five days later.
• 2001: The U.S. invasion of Afghanistan began with an air assault and covert operations on the ground.
• 2006: A Chinese man wanted by police on gun charges gave himself up after hiding in a cave constructed at the back of his house for eight years. The 35-year-old man had tunneled the cave out of a hill behind the bedroom of his house and had put a wardrobe in front of the entrance as a disguise. The man left the cave during the day to read, wash and watch television in the house, but went back into it at night. He told his wife he was hiding from debt collectors. He gave himself up to police after no longer being able to cope with the “psychological pressure”.
• Coffee With A Cop Day
• Chocolate Covered Pretzel Day
• Forgiveness Day
• Pumpkin Seed Day
• Kale Day
• Bald and Free Day
• Random Acts of Poetry Day
• Walk To School Day
• Frappe Day
• Bathtub Day
35,450: American men injured each year while cooking.
Singer Katie Perry is selling her spare mansion for $8 million. [Sweet… I’ll be getting a new neighbor.]
QAnon has been kicked off Facebook and Instagram. [That’s Q bad.]
The first Vice Presidential debate is tonight. [This is the one with the laugh-track, right?]
Plexiglass barriers will separate the vice presidential candidates at tonight’s debate. [And for added protection, those beaded curtains they used in the ‘70s to separate the bedroom from the living room.]
Three scientists won this year’s Nobel Prize in physics for advancing our understanding of black holes. [They learned they’re not black-black, but more of a Folger’s coffee black.]
More White House staffers have tested positive for COVID-19. [I hope not with taxpayer money.]
Apple will unveil the next iPhone on October 13. [Finally it will have an actual apple smell.]
Pumpkin experts remind us that after you find the one you want, never pick it up by the stem or it could break. [Instead, use that new app to hire someone to carry it for you. It’s called Puber (poober).]
🎧 JAILERS FACE CRUELTY CHARGE FOR PLAYING BABY SHARK ON LOOP _ Two former Oklahoma detention officers and their supervisor were charged after an investigation found inmates at the Oklahoma County jail were forced to listen to the popular children’s song Baby Shark on a loop at loud volumes for extended periods of time. At least four inmates were subjected to the “inhuman” discipline in an attorney visitation room of the jail last November and December, according to the charge. The inmates was forced to stand the entire time, hands cuffed behind them and secured to the wall. The DA charged the detention officers with misdemeanor counts of cruelty to a prisoner and conspiracy.
APPLE’S NEXT IPHONE WILL BE ANNOUNCED ON OCTOBER 13TH _ Apple has announced that its iPhone event will take place on October 13, with the invitation teasing the announcement with the phrase “Hi, Speed.” The rumored iPhone 12 lineup is expected to have a new design and support for 5G networks. It’s also supposed to come in four different models.
NEARLY NINE IN 10 THINK BUYING THE LATEST SMARTPHONE IS A WASTE OF MONEY _ Nearly nine in 10 adults think buying the latest smartphone is a ‘waste of money’. And in the survey, more than half are ‘bored’ of trying to keep up-to-date with the latest tech.
JOHN DALY HIT A HOLE-IN-ONE WHILE BAREFOOT _ John Daly’s still got it. The professional golfer and party man recently hit his 11th hole-in-one — while barefoot. The best part? It was during a charity event for fallen Navy Seals. • VIDEO
FEDERAL AGENT IMPERSONATOR BRANDISHED GUN OVER MASK-WEARING _ A Pennsylvania man is facing charges for impersonating a Department of Homeland Security officer and brandishing a gun to a Walmart shopper who wasn’t wearing a mask. According to police (Cambria Township) 72-year-old Michael Baglio has been charged for impersonating a public servant and making terroristic threats with intent to terrorize another.
BEAR WANDERS HALLWAY OF COLORADO LODGE _ An employee at a Colorado lodge captured video of an unusual guest — a black bear — that wandered through the lobby and hallways. Anna Williams, who works at the YMCA of the Rockies in Estes Park, said she was working late when she heard a crashing sound in the lobby about 2AM. Williams discovered a bear had wandered into the building and now was wandering the hallways. Williams posted video to Facebook of the bear walking around the hallway before she retreated into a room when the animal appeared to become aggressive. Williams wrote in her post: “A little while later I heard security come in and chase it out.” • VIDEO
RUSSELL WESTBROOK LEFT $8,000 TIP FOR HOUSEKEEPERS _ Houston Rockets superstar Russell Westbrook showed his thanks to the NBA bubble housekeepers by leaving an $8,000 tip. The 31-year-old gave respect to those doing the dirty work before the Rockets left the bubble — gifting them the massive tip and leaving his room “virtually spotless.”
CITY DWELLERS ARE NO LESS FRIENDLY THAN COUNTRY FOLK _ A new study finds people living in a city or major urban area are no less friendly or helpful to strangers than those living in the country or more rural areas. Researchers from University College London carried out social experiments in 12 cities and 12 towns across the UK to measure how friendliness among residents. Experiments carried out by the research team looked at whether people would mail a lost letter, return a dropped item, and stop to let someone cross the road. They found city-dwellers were just as helpful as people in smaller towns.
SCIENTISTS FIND 24 PLANETS THAT MAY BE ‘MORE SUITABLE’ FOR LIFE THAN EARTH _ When you consider the infinite size of the universe, there’s no question Earth is special. Our planet sits in that perfect little zone, around a perfectly warm enough sun, which makes life possible. A new study is giving Earthlings a dose of cosmic reality. Astronomers say Earth isn’t so perfect after all and they’ve found two dozen planets which may be even more suitable for life than our home.
… Washington State University scientist Dirk Schulze-Makuch says our galaxy is home to planets which potentially fall into the category of “superhabitable.” Those Earth-like exoplanets include ones which are older, larger, warmer, and wetter than the Earth. Superhabitable planets which circle around their stars more slowly could also help life to thrive more easily than it does here.
… Ready to visit? Unfortunately the top 24 interstellar contenders for human life are all over 100 light-years away from our solar system.
IF YOUR MAN HAS A DEEP, SEXY VOICE — HE MIGHT CHEAT ON YOU _ Who knew the deep-voiced could be so shallow. Chinese researchers found that men with deeper voices are more likely to cheat on their partner.
WOMAN FINDS NEEDLE IN HER SPINE 16 YEARS AFTER GIVING BIRTH _ When the pain in her shoulders and weakness in her right leg started two years ago, Giovanna Ippolito thought it was just part of getting older — that’s until the 46-year-old’s doctor in Ontario ordered an X-ray that showed a five-centimeter long, broken needle embedded in her spine. It was a medical error that took more than a decade to discover. Exactly when the needle was left in Ippolito’s spine is unclear, but she says she’s only had something injected into her back twice — during the birth of her son in 2002 and her daughter in 2004.
HOW TO PICK THE PERFECT PUMPKIN _ When you think of Halloween, you may think trick-or-treating and fall, but you likely also think pumpkins. Illinois is the top pumpkin-producing state in the U.S. and it’s only fitting that some pumpkin-picking advice would come from there. A University of Illinois horticulture educator says we should choose a pumpkin with a stem at least 1 to 2 inches long. Never carry it by the stem.
… Avoid pumpkins with holes, cuts or soft spots. These areas will decay.
… Use the thumbnail test. Press your thumbnail into the pumpkin, if your nail makes a scratch in the pumpkin, do not select.
… Color is also important. Light-colored pumpkins are easier to carve because the skin is not as hard as darker ones, but they will not keep as well.
… Before carving or display, wash the pumpkin with warm water and let it dry. The pumpkin will last longer in a cool place. After carving, coat the inside of the pumpkin and the cuts with petroleum jelly. A pumpkin cut for Halloween will last seven to 10 days depending on weather conditions.
… Avoid using candles to light a pumpkin because the heat will cook the flesh, shortening its lifespan.
DRIVER’S STRESS TIED TO COLOR OF CAR _ German researchers reported that a driver’s stress level can be determined by the color of her car. People driving black cars tend to get stressed out in traffic at a rate of 36 percent. People with white cars are much more relaxed in traffic with only 16 percent stressing out
… Rating the stressful colors from most to least, the researchers put black on top, followed by red, gray or silver, green, blue and finally white. It’s not known whether car color affects the driver, or if people choose colors matching their personalities.
AUTUMN IS THE MOST LIKELY TIME TO FALL OFF A DIET _ If you’re on a diet, watch out: Autumn is the most likely time to fall off your diet. Researchers (Georgia State University) found you are most likely to pack on the pounds in the fall. People eat 11 percent more food in autumn than in winter, 14 percent more than in the spring, and 12 percent more than in the summer.
A YEAR AGO THIS WEEK: WE EAT ABOUT 7½ ALONE MEALS EACH WEEK _ According to research Americans eat 387 meals by themselves every year. That’s about 7½ alone meals a week. But alone doesn’t always mean lonely. The survey revealed that 68 percent of Americans look forward to eating a meal alone. The top reason: It’s more relaxing.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: SUSPICIOUS DEVICES ON TRUMP SIGNS WERE THEFT ALARMS _ Several “suspicious devices” were found on Trump-Pence campaign signs around a Maryland city, but when bomb squads arrived, they realized those devices were small alarm systems. Officials said the devices posed no threat to the public — they’re just audible alarms that sound when a pull-pin, attached to a string, is tugged away.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MAN POOPED IN BOX AT STORE, PUT IT BACK ON SHELF _ A man pooped in an empty box, closed it, then left it on a shelf at a Detroit-area grocery store (Meijer). The suspect left the parking lot in a light-colored Ford Escape. Police said they have no leads on any suspects at this point.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: TWO MISSOURI MEN CHARGED FOR ILLEGAL HAND FISHING _ Two Missouri men have been charged for “noodling” or illegal hand fishing catfish at the Lake of the Ozarks. According to the Missouri Department of Conservation, “noodling” is an illegal technique where poachers reach their hands or hooks into catfish nests and drag the catfish out. By doing this, they are removing the parent fish from the nest then kills the hundreds of eggs it was protecting, which would become more catfish to catch.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: BURGLAR LEAVES PHONE BEHIND _ A teenager in China new to the auto burglary profession will probably re-think his career. He broke into luxury vehicle and got away with some jewelry hidden in the glove box. But police quickly tracked him down because he left his phone in the car.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: EMPLOYEE ACCUSED OF STEALING AT LEAST $1.3 MILLION IN PRINTER TONER _ A public library employee in Austin, Texas, is accused of stealing at least $1.3 million in printer toner, storing it in the garage of his home and selling it online. According to an investigative report by the City of Austin’s auditor office, the employee was identified as Randall Whited, an “accounting associate” at the library. As an accounting associate, Whited was responsible for making and approving purchases, cash receipts, billing and other accounting transactions.
… During the time period in question Whited allegedly bought at least $1.5 million worth of printer toner. City officials say they would have needed about $150,000 worth of printer toner during this time period.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: ESCAPED KANGAROO CAPTURED IN WASHINGTON STATE _ Police in Washington state said a baby kangaroo that escaped was safely recaptured and taken for a check-up. The kangaroo escaped Tuesday morning and the public was asked to keep a lookout for the young animal. The marsupial’s owners wrote on a Facebook post that the 8-week-old male red kangaroo escaped when a friend transporting it in their van let him “out to potty and lost him.”
BIG BROTHER (8p ET, CBS) — New. Houseguests vie for the power of veto.
20/20 (8p ET, ABC) — This special edition previews the Vice-Presidential debate.
THE WEAKEST LINK (8p ET, NBC) — New.
THE MASKED SINGER (8p ET, FOX) — New. Contestants return for the Group A playoffs and their second performances
PREMIERE: DEVILS (8p ET, CW) — Patrick Dempsey stars in this imported drama series about the high-stakes world of international finance. He plays a CEO of a powerful bank that is rocked by the sudden death of one of its employees.
DOCTOR WHO: THE FACELESS ONES (8p ET, BBC America) — Doctor Who faces off against The Faceless Ones in this animated re-creation of one of the sci-fi drama’s long-lost 1960s serials.
THE VICE-PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE (9p ET, CBS, ABC, NBC, FOX) — The vice-presidential debate between Kamala Harris and Mike Pence will be moderated by Susan Page, USA Today’s Washington bureau chief.
SEASON PREMIERE: CORONER (9p ET, CW) — Season 2 of this Canadian forensics drama begins.
WILD CARD: THE DOWNFALL OF A RADIO LOUDMOUTH (9p ET, HBO) — This documentary looks at the rise and fall of prominent New York sports radio personality Craig Carton. Through a series of candid interviews, the film reveals how his secret insatiable gambling addiction, financed by an illicit ticket-broking business, brought his career to a sudden halt when he was arrested by FBI agents in 2017. The documentary includes interviews with his former co-host Boomer Esiason, former New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, and more.
HUBIE HALLOWEEN (Netflix) — This new Adam Sandler film is about a Halloween fanatic who must save the day when creepy things begin happening. Maya Rudolph, Ray Liotta, Julie Bowen, Steve Buscemi, Kevin James, and Rob Schneider also star.
TO THE LAKE (Netflix) — In this new original film, a group facing the end of civilization due to a terrifying plague risks their lives, loves and humanity in a struggle to survive.
BOOKS OF BLOOD (Hulu) — This new terror tale, based on the Clive Barker horror anthology, stars Britt Robertson and Anna Friel.
RED TABLE TALK: THE ESTEFANS (Facebook Watch) — This new talk show series is set in Miami and features music icon Gloria Estefan, her daughter and up-and-coming musician Emily Estefan and TV host and niece Lili Estefan. The women will have candid conversations on topics such as social and personal issues and will occasionally have special celebrity guests and experts to join the conversation.
LEGENDARY ROCKER EDDIE VAN HALEN DEAD AT 65 FROM CANCER _ Iconic rocker and guitarist Eddie Van Halen died on Tuesday following a battle with throat cancer. He was 65. Van Halen — who founded the legendary band, which was named after his family, along with older brother Alex Van Halen in 1972 — was unquestionably one of rock ‘n’ roll’s most lauded guitarists, named No. 8 in Rolling Stone’s list of the 100 all-time greatest guitarists. His unique playing style helped define the rock and metal genres, as well as anchored one of the most successful bands in rock history.
JURASSIC WORLD: DOMINION DELAYS RELEASE TO 2022 _ Dinosaurs won’t rule the big screen again until 2022. Jurassic World: Dominion will now debut on June 10, 2022 — a year later than originally planned. Universal Pictures, the studio behind the sci-fi adventure franchise, initially scheduled the movie for summer 2021.
… Jurassic World: Dominion, which shut down filming in March due to the pandemic, was one of the first major movies to resume production. The studio took intense measures to keep the set free of coronavirus, including frequent testing, temperature checks and isolating the cast. Jurassic World: Dominion hasn’t completed filming yet, though sources say its about three weeks from wrapping.
WONDER WOMAN 1984 REPORTEDLY SKIPPING THEATERS _ At this point, it feels a bit like we’ve been waiting to see Wonder Woman 1984 since 1984. It was originally due out in December 2019, but has been the victim of various shifts to its release date, both before and after COVID-19. And though it’s currently scheduled for this Christmas, the fact that Warner Bros. has just moved back all of its other upcoming DC films suggests that it’s going to shuffled along yet again. Or maybe not.
… A new report claims that the reason Wonder Woman 1984 wasn’t included in WB’s renewed release date timeline is because it’s actually sticking where it is, but it’s going straight to streaming. At the moment, though, this is all just talk.
A SLINKY MOVIE IS IN THE WORKS _ Slinky — the popular springy children’s toy — is getting the Hollywood treatment. The movie will be based on the true story behind the inception of the classic toy.
… Though the Slinky was created by Richard James, the film will center on his wife Betty James, who took over the struggling business after her husband left her with their six children and a nearly bankrupt company. In an era dominated by male CEOs, Betty James held her own and helped turn the Slinky into a must-have item for kids.
ON THE ROCKS HAS BILL MURRAY PLAYING THE SUPPORTIVE DAD _ The trailer for On the Rocks has been released. The film is coming to Apple TV+ and stars Bill Murray returning to New York to visit his daughter, played by Rashida Jones, whose husband (Marlon Wayans) and his business are on an upward trajectory. Bill’s character is suspicious of his son-in-law’s frequent business travels and hatches a plan to spy on him. • VIDEO
… On the Rocks lands on Apple TV+ October 23.
KATY PERRY SELLING HER “SPARE” MANSION FOR $8 MILLION _ You know what they say: It’s always good to have a backup. But it appears Katy Perry doesn’t need hers anymore. Variety reports that the new mom has listed a Beverly hills mansion she bought in 2018. The $8 million home was an “extra” property that Katy bought to use as a guest home for family and friends, but it’s no little cottage: It’s got more than 4,400 square feet, four bedrooms and 4.5 baths.
… The mansion also features a pool, several fireplaces and a master bedroom with a built-in soaking tub, steam shower, private outdoor balcony and walk-in closets. It’s in a star-studded private enclave where neighbors include Adele, Jennifer Lawrence, Cameron Diaz, Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis, and Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban.
… Katy, her new baby Daisy Dove and fiancé Orlando Bloom, currently live in the same community, in a $19 million mansion.
DID ADELE SPEND $20K ON BIRTHDAY GIFT FOR GUY SHE MIGHT BE DATING? _ For a while now, there’s been speculation that Adele is involved romantically with British rapper Skepta. While the two don’t actually seem to be dating in the traditional close way, they do seem to be pretty tight. And reportedly Adele just dropped more than $20,000 on his birthday gift. The British tabloid The Mirror reports that Adele spent about $20,600 to buy Skepta a gold chain for his 38th birthday. The Mirror also claims that Adele and Skepta were seen laughing together at Otherworld, a “virtual reality” bar in London, before moving to a VIP Lounge.
THE MOST STRESSFUL THINGS ABOUT DRIVING
1. Driving in the snow
2. Driving in an unknown area
3. Driving in the rain
5. Hitting a pothole
6. Driving in the fog
7. Driving in the dark
8. Feeling like a large vehicle e.g. truck/bus is too close to your car
9. Getting a warning light
10. Finding a parking space
… The list goes on — there are 50 things that stress us about driving, according to a survey. No. 14 is parallel parking. No. 23 is roundabouts. No. 36 is driving wit a child in the car. No. 50 is not knowing how to turn on the windshield wipers.
DO YOU STILL HAVE ‘KID’ INTERESTS?
• Do you still build LEGO models?
• Do you celebrate your half birthday?
• Still gather with friends for Dungeons & Dragons?
Start it on Facebook, take it to the phones: You’re all grown up, but what are your “kid” interests?
PERSONALITY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN COFFEE AND TEA DRINKERS
A study examined the personality differences in people based on their morning beverage of choice: coffee or tea.
• If you’re a creative, introverted morning person, then odds are you prefer coffee over tea. Tea drinkers are more likely to be extroverted, adventurous night owls.
• The average coffee drinker typically downs 3.4 cups a day, while tea fans sip through 2.7 cups.
• Coffee drinkers prefer dogs; self-identify as messy; prefer TV shows like Grey’s Anatomy, The Office, and Seinfeld; are more likely to be on time; are more likely to be single; prefer rock, blues, jazz and punk.
• Tea drinkers prefer cats; are more likely to be tidy; prefer TV shows like The Walking Dead, Friends, and The Big Bang Theory; are on time less than half the time; are more likely to be in a relationship; prefer pop, hip-hop, rap, country and classical.
TRIVIA: One in twenty Americans think there are too many of these. (Holidays)
TRIVIA: Researchers claim that, on the average, a woman is three times more sensitive than a man to what while sleeping? (Noises)
TRIVIA: Seven million Americans to this each year. (Move to a different state)
SPY THE LIE
• The planet with the shortest year is Mercury.
• Oak is the ideal wood for baseball bats. (LIE. It’s White Ash.)
• 11 percent of the world’s population is left handed.
HOLE IN THE HEADLINE
Guess the word that’s missing from this real news headline: “DRUNK COLLEGE STUDENT GETS STUCK IN ______”
We’re all unraveling. Quarantine has folks, old and young, losing their marbles and hitting the sauce with some added giddy-up. Case in point: Rosie Cole from Hull University in the UK. Rosie and her friends were downing bottles of Zinfandel and throwing back the tequila when she was dared to fit herself in a clothes dryer. She thought there was “no chance” she’d fit, but she did — and she got stuck. Rosie says, “It wasn’t until I wiggled both my hips in and got my legs crossed behind me that I realized I couldn’t get out. I am a bit dramatic so I didn’t think it was that bad at first and my house mates were making me laugh.” Firefighters had to be called and it took them about 20 minutes to free Rosie.
• Paul Hogan is 81
• Chevy Chase is 77
• R.L. Stine (Goosebumps) is 77
• Sigourney Weaver is 71
• Robert Kool Bell of Kool and the Gang is 70
• Darrell Hammond (Saturday Night Live) is 65
• Karyn Parsons (Hilary Banks on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air) is 54
• Emily Procter (CSI: Miami) is 52
• Matt Damon is 50
• Nick Cannon is 40
• Bruno Mars is 35
• Angus T. Jones (Two and a Half Men) is 27
• Bella Thorne (TV’s Shake It Up, film Midnight Sun) is 23
IT HAPPENED TODAY
• 1818: Two English boxers became the first to use padded gloves.
• 1956: Don Larsen of the New York Yankees pitched the first perfect game in the history of the World Series.
• 1964: Ringo Starr took and passed his driving test.
• 2001: President George W. Bush announced the establishment of the Office of Homeland Security.
• 2005: A Bulgarian became the first ever European Heavyweight Chessboxing Champion. Tihomir ‘Tiger’ Titschko walked off with the title at the Chessboxing Championships in Germany.
• 2015: Actress and singer Selena Gomez revealed she has Lupus.
• Face Your Fears Day
• Pierogy Day
• Salmon Day
• World Octopus Day
• Fluffernutter Day
• Depression Screening Day