PRO October 24, 2014

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Audio • Bits & Breaks • Datebook • Datebook Tomorrow • Entertainment • Fun & Games • Image of the Day • Joke of the Day! • Last Minute Items • News & Nuggets • News Attack • Number for the Day • Television • Video of the Day • Wacky-But-True

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DATEBOOK: OCTOBER 24, 2014

This is day 297 of 2014. There are 68 days remaining.

BIRTHDAYS

• Former Rolling Stones bassist Bill Wyman is 78

• F. Murray Abraham is 75

• Kevin Kline is 67

• B.D. Wong (Oz, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit) is 54

• Rapper Drake is 28

IT HAPPENED TODAY

• 1861: The first transcontinental telegraph message was sent from California to President Abraham Lincoln.

• 1939: Nylon stockings were sold publicly for the first time, in Wilmington, Del.

• 1940: The 40-hour work week went into effect in the United States.

• 2001: The House passed a $100 billion economic stimulus package in the wake of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks.

• 2003: The era of supersonic jet travel came to an end as three British Airways Concordes landed at London’s Heathrow Airport.

• 2004: Ten people, including 4 family members of Rick Hendrick, were killed in a plane crash near Martinsville Speedway. The plane was owned by NASCAR team Hendrick Motorsports.

• 2005: Civil rights activist Rosa Parks died at age 92.

• 2006: A man tried to walk through the drive-through window at a Burger King in Salt Lake City, Utah, at around 9:30pm. When the restaurant staff told him they didn’t serve pedestrians at the window, the man beat on the glass and then stepped to a nearby pay phone in sight of the staff. The suspect then called police and made a bomb threat on the Burger King. He was found a few minutes later and was arrested.

SPECIAL EVENTS

• Today is Food Day.

• Today is Bologna Day.

UPCOMING

• NBA season begins: October 28

• Halloween: October 31

• Daylight Saving Time ends: November 2

• Veteran’s Day: November 11

• Final NASCAR race of Sprint Cup season (Ford EcoBoost 400): November 16

• Thanksgiving (U.S.): November 27

• Black Friday: November 28

• Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day: December 7

• Chanukah/Hanukkah (first day): December 17

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DATEBOOK WEEKEND

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 25

• Marion Ross (Happy Days) is 86. Nancy Cartwright (The Simpsons) is 57. Mark Miller of Sawyer Brown is 56. Craig Robinson (The Office) is 43. Katy Perry is 30.

• Today is Make A Difference Day.

• It’s National Forgiveness Day.

• It’s Pit Bull Awareness Day.

• Today is World Pasta Day.

• It’s Greasy Foods Day.

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 26

• Jaclyn Smith (Charlie’s Angels) is 69. Wheel of Fortune host Pat Sajak is 68. Dylan McDermott is 53. Keith Urban is 47. Writer-actor Seth McFarlane is 41.

• Today is Mother-in-Law Day.

• It’s Visit A Cemetery Day.

• It’s National Pumpkin Day.

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NUMBER FOR THE DAY

9,200: Americans injured by garage doors each year.

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NEWS ATTACK!

North Korea gave western journalists a rare extensive look at the natural wonders of the country in order to boost tourism. [You just have to get used to those tourist signs everywhere that say “Please Do Not Feed The People”.]

In China a woman upset over being dumped by her boyfriend took refuge for days on end inside a 24-hour KFC. [It was sad. She kept nibbling her chicken nuggets into little hearts.]

A rare six-pound nugget of California gold went on sale Thursday. [Kanye and Kim bought it for Baby North to play with. It’s their version of Mr. Potato Head.]

There’s a movement afoot for South Florida to become the 51st state. [They already have a capital building– Cinderella’s Castle.]

At the beginning of the new year tobacco giant Reynolds American will no longer allow employees to smoke wherever they want in the building. [Not that smoking’s bad for you or anything like that.]

Kenny G visited Hong Kong protesters which got mainland China upset. Now he has deleted his selfie taken with the protesters, and says that he doesn’t know much about their cause, which now has the protesters upset. [Kenny G has really grown as an artist. He used to have to actually play to get people this irritated.]

Mark Zuckerberg shocked everyone when he visited a Beijing university, and conducted a 30-minute Q & A in Mandarin. [The man holds down a demanding full-time job, yet manages to learn Chinese — unlike those losers who spend all day on Facebook.]

A 500-pound Florida man resisted arrest by sitting down and challenging deputies to move him. [That’s pretty much the same strategy congress has had for the past six years.]

The Oklahoma Supreme Court has ruled that it is not legally acceptable for a woman to inform a former boyfriend that he is the father of her child through a Facebook post. [The court also ruled out the Jumbotron.]

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NEWS & NUGGETS

UPS DRIVER REACHES 40 ACCIDENT-FREE YEARS _ Ginny Odom has racked up more than 4 million miles driving across the U.S. delivering packages. And in those 40 years, Odom hasn’t had a single accident, a milestone for one of UPS’s first female delivery drivers. Odom, from Winter Park, Florida,, was 23 when she took to the roads as a UPS delivery driver, driving boxy brown delivery trucks for almost a decade before moving on up to tractor-trailers. Odom credits the defensive driving skill that UPS teaches. Recently, when Odom rolled into home base from her usual 650-mile round trip to Georgia towing twin 28-foot trailers, she became the first female UPS driver in history to drive 40 years and more than 4 million miles without so much as a fender bender.

DONATIONS POUR IN TO BUY CAR FOR PENNSYLVANIA COP-KILLER LOOKALIKE _ James Tully walks two hours to work everyday along a Pennsylvania roadway, in the vicinity of where suspected cop-killer Eric Frein has been spotted. Tully has a slight resemblance to Frein and has been stopped by police several times. Now donations are coming in so he can have a car to get to work. Tully said the frequent stops by local law enforcement have become “part of the routine” along his 5 mile walk. One day he was stopped a total of seven times. Donors have set up a GoFundMe campaign to get Tully a car so he can drive to work and not have to worry about the constant run-ins with law enforcement. As of this moment, donations total (check total here).

ALASKA VILLAGE TO GET RID OF ‘HONEY BUCKET SYSTEM’ _ Today, be thankful for running water and flush toilets. Because, believe it or not, some parts of the U.S. don’t have them. In the western Alaska village of Akiachak, roughly half the homes use the “honey bucket system.” These homes lack indoor plumbing, so residents are forced to use large buckets as toilets; the waste is then deposited into village receptacles, which have been known to leak. Soon that should change: The village is on the receiving end of a $5 million grant that will go toward construction of sewer mains and other parts of a core system that can be hooked up later to 100 houses in the community still without indoor plumbing.

DIAMOND RING FLUSHED DOWN THE TOILET _ A diamond ring was accidentally flushed down a toilet at a doctor’s office in Pennsylvania. The ring belonged to Cindy Vriens (of Boiling Springs) and had been given to her by her grandmother 36 years ago. It was 75 to 100 years old. That was a Friday. On Monday she contacted the Sewer Authority which dispatched a couple of workers to a manhole just outside the business park where the ring had been lost. Thanks to an underground U-shaped trap that prevents sewer gas from creeping back into a building, the three men who were searching for the ring found it — and in about 30 minutes.

APP LETS YOU SIGN INSTAGRAMS WITH YOUR HEARTBEAT _ Sharing every aspect of our personal lives online has become an inescapable part of the 21st century. A new app wants to bring our biological information to light too. Biogram stamps heart rates onto Instagram photos and other social media posts. The app will be released next month. Biogram works with the AliveCor, a portable heart rate monitor that doubles as a smartphone case. After tracking their heart rate, users will be able to stamp their Instagram photos or Facebook posts.

UNIVERSITY TO OFFER COURSE ON RIHANNA WOMANISM VS. BEYONCÉ FEMINISM _ You can finally get college credit for doing what many have been doing for free on Twitter. You can now argue about who is better — Rihanna or Beyonce? Better yet, you can argue Beyonce’s feminism vs. Rihanna’s womanism. The African & African Diaspora Studies department at the University of Texas will be presenting “Beyonce Feminism, Rihanna Womanism”.

… According to the class description: Students in this class will learn that there is far more than catchy melodies to Beyoncé’s and Rihanna’s music. They will not be simply listening to Beyoncé and Rihanna for fun or even comparing the roles of Beyoncé and Rihanna in popular culture, rather, students will be studying how the lyrics, music videos, and actions of these women express various aspects of black feminism such as violence, economic opportunity, sexuality, standards of beauty, and creative self-expression. The instructor hopes for students to understand the role black feminism plays in popular culture as well as everyday life.

SCHOOL HELD GRADUATION EARLY FOR STUDENT WITH ONLY 4 MONTHS TO LIVE _ Lynzee Ford is a 17-year-old senior at Kilgore High School in Texas. Ford was diagnosed with leukemia in January. Doctors told her that she most likely wouldn’t live long enough to graduate in the spring. Ford was heavily involved with the athletics program at Kilgore High, and when her friends found out that she might not get to graduate with her class, they decided to move the date up. Ford’s friends, family, and the school’s students and administration all gathered together to hold a graduation for the 17-year-old. Kilgore High School Principal Gregg Brown was the keynote speaker. Ford’s friends weren’t satisfied with just an early graduation, though. They’re moving prom up to November.

NFL SAYS IT’S ‘ON TRACK’ IN 15-YEAR PLAN TO FIELD LONDON TEAM _ The National Football League is “exactly on track” with its plans to field a team in London and could have a franchise there by 2022. The Detroit Lions and Atlanta Falcons will play Sunday at Wembley Stadium. Sunday’s game marks the second of three sold-out games the league will play this season at Wembley, the home of England’s national soccer team. Each of the NFL games this year in London will draw more than 83,000 fans. Should the NFL place a team in London, the league would then look at other countries for possible franchises, possibly Germany or Brazil.

DRINK BEER TO IMPROVE CHANCES OF FATHERING A CHILD, AVOID COFFEE _ If you’re a man and you’re trying to conceive, you should start drinking. According to a study (Massachusetts General Hospital), a few beers a day increases chances of having a baby. However, drinking even a few cups of coffee is bad for reproduction.

… Massachusetts General Hospital found those who downed at least 24 ounces each day were more than twice as likely to have children, and coffee had the opposite effect.

160,000 DIAPERS STOLEN FROM DALLAS CHARITY _ Over 160,000 diapers were stolen from a children’s charity in Dallas. The charity says the loss is equivalent to almost two months’ worth of diapers. Dallas police are still investigating. But there is some good news in this story. Kimberly Clark, which makes Huggies and other diapers, is going to replace all of the diapers that were stolen.

APP SCANS YOUR PROPORTIONS AND MAILS YOU A CUSTOM-FITTED SHIRT _ There’s nothing quite like a custom shirt that’s been tailored to your exact measurements, but they usually come with a hefty price tag. A new app called MTailor plans to change that by outsourcing the measurements to your smartphone’s camera. Shirts start at $69, but that’s still cheaper than other custom shirts out there, which can cost $100 and up. Also, shipping is free.

… First, you choose the type of fabric you’d like in your fitted shirt. You can also choose the style of cuff and collar you’d like. Next, you use your phone’s camera to record your measurements, which the app guides you through. Basically, you need to wear clothing that is as skin-tight as possible, and then you’re asked to slowly rotate so your proportions are recorded. MTailor claims that using a camera to record your body measurements is a process that can be completed in less than five minutes and that it’s “scientifically proven to measure you 20% more accurately than a professional tailor.” Once the app has your measurements and shirt choice, the MTailor team gets to work, creating your shirt from scratch and sending you email updates along the way.

COMETS LIKELY SMELL AWFUL _ Comets stink, and not just because they have the potential to cause cataclysmic devastation if they ever came hurtling through our atmosphere and made impact with Earth. These “cosmic snowballs of frozen gases, rock, and dust roughly the size of a small town” (as described by NASA) literally stink to high heaven, according to scientists at Switzerland’s University of Bern. Researchers analyzed the “perfume” of comet 67P/Churyumov-Gerasimenko and said that its BO is apparently a combo of “rotten eggs, horse urine, formaldehyde, bitter almonds, alcohol, vinegar, and a hint of sweet ether.” The scientists were able to surmise what the comet would smell like by examining the gas emitted by the comet’s head.

SWISS RETAILER APOLOGIZES FOR HITLER APPEARING ON COFFEE CREAMER LIDS _ A Swiss retailer has apologized for putting the faces of Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini on coffee creamer lids. Migros said an unfortunate string of errors led to the images of the Nazi dictator and his Italian Fascist counterpart Benito Mussolini appearing on its labels. Executives promised to withdraw the creamer lids from all cafes and restaurants to which they’d been sent.

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WACKY-BUT-TRUE

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: NAKED WOMAN RUNS THROUGH THE SNOW FOR NO APPARENT REASON _ Police in Russian weren’t sure whether to believe the reports of a naked woman running through the snow — but that’s exactly what they found when they investigated. Despite the freezing cold weather, the 23-year-old student was running through a park in Kirov, Russia, without a thing on her. A passer-by had apparently asked her what she was doing but the woman ran off instead of answering. She then climbed up a ladder to the top of a sports venue before police arrived at the scene. Despite pleas to come down, the woman refused. Police managed to grab hold of her when they climbed the roof and offered her a blanket.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: BOY GETS STUCK IN A TOY VENDING MACHINE _ 18-month-old Colin Lambert was stuck. At first his grandmother was amused, but then she had to figure out how to get Colin out of a claw toy vending machine in Maryville, Tennessee. Firefighters were called to the coin laundry where Colin had climbed into the machine. After they freed him they let him keep one of the toys.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: SCHOOL KEEPS FORMER HEADMASTER’S BONES IN CLASS _ A Romanian school has been told it can continue using the skeleton of a former headmaster to teach anatomy. Alexandru Grigore Popescu worked at the rural elementary school in Romania for 50 years until his death. He said in his will that he had always wanted to have a skeleton in the class for biology lessons and wanted his own donated. But the skeleton had been confiscated when health and safety officials discovered it was the real thing and insisted on having it checked to see if it was hygienic. After being specially treated and put in a glass case, the skeleton has now been returned to the school. Although it may seem grisly, kids at the school say they find it helpful during classes to have the skeleton, and were pleased to see a return.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MEN FIGHT OVER STOLEN CHICKEN WING _ Deputies in Florida (Naples) say a man who stole a chicken wing from another diner was knocked out when another patron threw a pool ball at his head.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: ROAD RAGE _ Residents of Arksey, England, tried time and time again over two decades to get their local council to repave a section of road. The mud and deep holes, they say, presented obstacles to both vehicles and pedestrians. They claim officials said the road wasn’t their responsibility, so residents collected nearly $10,000 to get the road paved and speed humps installed. Now the council claims it has “always” maintained the road, the speed humps are “illegal,” and it’s going to take them out.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: SET YOUR iPHONE TO AUTO-UPLOAD _ There’s a good lead for police in New Orleans after two men robbed three women at gunpoint in the street. The women handed over their purses and cell phones, and ran. The robbers used one of the phones to take pictures of themselves holding their guns. The phone was set to automatically upload photos to the victim’s account. The photos include a third man, which the women say didn’t participate in the robbery, who is also holding a pistol. The victim turned the photos over to police, who posted them online asking for leads. Police detectives say they know one of the men.

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ON TELEVISION

MLB WORLD SERIES (7:30p ET, FOX) — The series moves to San Francisco for Game 3. The Royals and Giants are tied at a game apiece.

THE AMAZING RACE (8p ET, CBS) — New

DATELINE (8p ET, NBC) — New

LAST MAN STANDING (8p ET, ABC) — Erika Alexander (In Plain Sight) guest stars in this new episode.

JANE THE VIRGIN (8p ET, CW) — Repeat

CRISTELA (8:30p ET, ABC) — New

HAWAII FIVE-O (9p ET, CBS) — Amanda Setton (The Crazy Ones) guest stars in this new episode.

SEASON PREMIERE: GRIMM (9p ET, NBC) — Season 4 picks up right after the events of the season finale. Toni Trucks (Franklin & Bash, Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2) joins the cast this season.

SHARK TANK (9p ET, ABC) — New

AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL (9p ET, CW) — New

BLUE BLOODS (10p ET, CBS) — James Carpinello (The Good Wife, The Punisher) guest stars in this new episode.

SERIES PREMIERE: CONSTANTINE (10p ET, NBC) — This new series, based on DC Comics’ Hellblazer, stars Matt Ryan (Criminal Minds) as demon hunter and master of the occult John Constantine.  With his soul already damned to hell, he spends his life hunting demons. Lucy Griffiths (True Blood) and Harold Perrineau (Lost) also star.

20/20 (10p ET, ABC) — New

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ENTERTAINMENT

ZELDA WILLIAMS TATTOOS TRIBUTE TO LATE FATHER _ Robin Williams’ 25-year-old daughter Zelda shared an image of a tattoo tribute to her late father on Instagram Wednesday. The tattoo features a hummingbird inked above her father’s birthdate. In the photo caption Zelda wrote: “I’ll always put my hand out to shake with a smile.”

’90s GAME “MYST” BECOMING TV SERIES _ A TV series based on the 1993 video game Myst is being produced. The video game follows the adventures of The Stranger, “who uses a book to travel to the island of Myst, where he must find and follow clues that unlock different self-contained mini-worlds.” A new version of the game would be a companion piece to the TV drama, where viewers would be able to play the game along with the show.

JAMES CORDEN’S FIRST EDITION OF ‘LATE LATE SHOW’ TO AIR MARCH 9 _ The Late Late Show with James Corden will premiere March 9. The British 36-year-old Tony Award-winning actor is taking over as host from Craig Ferguson, the show’s emcee since 2004. Ferguson announced his plans last April to leave the program at the end of this year. The announcement came as the network chose Stephen Colbert to succeed retiring Late Show star David Letterman instead of Ferguson.

MIKE ‘THE SITUATION’ SORRENTINO PLEADS NOT GUILTY IN TAX-FRAUD CASE _ Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino pleaded not guilty to federal tax charges in a New Jersey court on Thursday. The “Jersey Shore” alum, who along with his brother Marc was indicted in September, appeared in U.S. District Court for the arraignment, where attorneys entered the not-guilty pleas for the brothers. The Sorrentinos stand accused of failing to pay federal taxes on nearly $9 million in income and were charged with conspiracy to defraud the federal government and filing false tax returns, including failing to report large cash payments the reality star received for promotional appearances.

… The Situation and his brother were originally expected to appear in court October 6, but the arraignment was postponed because the reality star was busy filming “Marriage Boot Camp” with fiancee Lauren Pesce in Los Angeles. The Situation faces two counts of filing false returns for 2010 and 2012 in addition to one count of failing to file taxes for 2011. If convicted, he could be sentenced to up to 11 years in prison

AARON PAUL GOES ON TOYS ‘R’ US RANT _ Aaron Paul got on Twitter Thursday to slam Toys “R” Us for pulling Breaking Bad toys from its shelves after a Florida mom started an online petition to get them removed. Paul’s rant against the store included attacks on Barbie and violent videogames, and even a fake quote from President Obama. He also shared a link to a competing petition asking Toys “R” Us to bring back the Breaking Bad toys. Paul tweeted:

— Wait, so @ToysRUs pulled all of the Breaking Bad figures from their shelves and still sells Barbie? Hmmmm…I wonder what is more damaging?

— And what about all of the violent video games you sell @ToysRUs ? Do you still sell those? Florida mom really messed it up for everyone.

‘ARCHIE’ DEVELOPED AS DRAMA TV SERIES ON FOX _ “Archie” will be coming to the small screen. FOX has picked up the TV series rights to “Archie Comics”, developing it as a one-hour drama titled “Riverdale”. “Riverdale” follows Archie, Betty, Veronica and their friends as they explore the surrealistic twists of small-town life, in addition to the darkness and weirdness bubbling beneath Riverdale’s wholesome facade.

FOX GIVES NEW DRAMA FRANKENSTEIN A LOOK _ Fox is getting into the monster mash with Frankenstein. This version of Mary Shelley’s classic Gothic tale centers on Adam Tremble, a morally corrupt FBI agent who is given a second chance at life after he is brought back from the dead. Now younger and stronger, Tremble will have to choose between his old temptations and his new sense of purpose.

J.K. ROWLING SLAMS ROMANCE NOVEL RUMORS ON TWITTER _ Despite reports to the contrary, J.K. Rowling’s next book will not be a romance novel. The Harry Potter author used Twitter to clear the air about the latest slew of rumors buzzing about her upcoming projects. She tweeted: “There’s a story in today’s Mail that I was in a London bar on Monday ‘celebrating’ handing in a ‘romantic novel’ to my publishers. 1) I haven’t handed in ANY kid of novel to my publishers. I’m only half way through my current book. 2) It isn’t a ‘romantic’ novel. And 3) (brace yourselves) I sometimes have a drink when I haven’t finished a book. Yes, that’s how rock and roll I really am.”

JENNIFER LAWRENCE BUYS HOME _ Jennifer Lawrence got into a bidding war — and won herself a new home. Lawrence is paying $8.2 million for a Beverly Hills home that has 5,500 square feet, 5 bedrooms and 5½ bathrooms. The property in question was last listed for $7.85 million, suggesting the Hunger Games star faced down some deep-pocketed competition for the property.

‘GAME OF THRONES’ MANIA HITS SPAIN AS 86,000 APPLY FOR ROLES _ Game of Thrones is conquering Spain: The HBO fantasy hit’s production is enjoying an overwhelming response since filming started in the country two weeks ago. When the local production company put out a casting call for roughly 600 extras for a key battle scene, Thrones fans responded with an incredible 86,000 applications.

MAMA JUNE REPORTEDLY DATING CONVICTED SEX OFFENDER _ Reality TV fans may love the bubbly Honey Boo Boo, but the new man in her mom’s life? Not so much. The future of the hit TLC show Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is now in question following a TMZ.com report that series matriarch Mama June is dating a convicted sex offender. The site reports that Mama June, who separated from Sugar Bear in September, has been dating Mark McDaniel for several months. McDaniel was convicted of aggravated child molestation in 2004 — during which time June was allegedly seeing him. According to TMZ, prosecutors alleged that he forced oral sex on an 8-year-old who is related to June. McDaniel served 10 years behind bars and was released this past March. He is now a registered sex offender in the state of Georgia.

… TLC issued a statement Thursday in response to the report: “TLC is not currently in production on Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. We are very concerned about this new information and are reassessing the future of the series.”

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AUDIO

I KNOW IT’S FALL WHEN Ask your listeners to complete this sentence: “I know it’s fall when…” You can get things going with the help of these three calls. » download

WHY DID YOU NEED STITCHES? Who just got stitches: you? A co-worker? Ask your listeners how they got their stitches and use these real calls to help with the phones. » download

WHAT KIDS WILL BE FOR HALLOWEEN Here are a handful of kids talking about what they’re going to be for Halloween. Good quality and real cute. » download

HALLOWEEN DROPS A big package of Halloween-related TV and movie drops. » download

BLACK FRIDAY STARTING ON THANKSGIVING Macy’s and Toys R Us will open just as some will be sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Launch a phoner with these real calls. » download

BLACK FRIDAY FIGHTS (From the archive) Ever witness a good Black Friday fight? One real call to launch a phoner. » download

SPOOKY MUSIC Need some spooky music? We found a bunch on YouTube.

WHAT DO YOU MISS BEFORE THE INTERNET? What do you miss before the Internet? Here’s one I hadn’t thought of: a friend of mine who’s a great cook says they miss cookbooks. She still has some it’s just easier to go online for recipes. What do you miss from before the Internet? Some real calls to help launch the phones » download

ANIMAL ENCOUNTERS. In my garage this morning, staring at me through the dark, was a possum. They are the creepiest animals, aren’t they? What’s your animal encounter story? Two real calls to jumpstart the phones. » download

JIMMINY CRICKETS! A female caller exclaims, “Jimminy crickets, that’s great!” » download

RULES FOR TEXTING. I’d like to have a law or rule that when you’re out with your kid your attention should be on him or her. For 30 minutes I saw a mom on her smartphone while her little guy, maybe 4, ran around a coffee shop trying to entertain himself. Every minute or so he’d come back to his mom and ask a question but her iPhone kept winning. What are your rules for texting? Two calls to jumpstart the phones. » download

WHAT DID YOUR PET EAT? We all have those stories of the dog slamming an entire pizza, or a drawer of socks. Share your personal story then open the phones. » download

FILL IN THE BLANK: YOU’RE NEVER TOO OLD TO… This one’s good to launch on Facebook. Simply post: “Fill in the blank: You’re never to old to ____.” Then use the best responses plus these quick calls to get more calls. Three calls to jumpstart the phones. » download

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BITS & BREAKS

NEW IN THEATERS TODAY

ST. VINCENT (PG-13)  score/reviews

• A young boy whose parents have just divorced finds an unlikely friend and mentor in the misanthropic, bawdy, hedonistic war veteran who lives next door.
• Bill Murray, Melissa McCarthy, Naomi Watts

JOHN WICK (R)  score/reviews

• Keanu Reeves
• An ex-hitman comes out of retirement to track down the gangsters that took everything from him.

OUIJA (PG-13)  score/reviews

• A group of friends must confront their most terrifying fears when they awaken the dark powers of an ancient spirit board.
• Olivia Cooke, Ana Coto, Daren Kagasoff

23 BLAST (PG-13)  score/reviews

• When a high school football star is suddenly stricken with irreversible total blindness, he must decide whether to live a safe handicapped life or bravely return to the life he once knew and the sport he still loves.
• Mark Hapka, Bram Hoover, Stephen Lang

NEW ON DVD THIS WEEKEND

• Snowpiercer
• The Purge: Anarchy
• Sex Tape
• Earth to Echo
• Mad Men: the Final Season-Part 1
• Married… with Children – Seasons 5 & 6

UNC CHEATING SCANDAL

A investigation has discovered a massive cheating scandal for athletes at the University of North Carolina with football and basketball players taking bogus classes. Some of the bogus classes include:

• Winning Battle Strategies: The History of Tic Tac Toe

• Statistics and Probability: Odds The Toilet Paper Will Unroll Over Versus Under

• Famous Sports Cheers of Post-War Europe

• Introduction to Psychology: Trash Talk 101

LOTS OF US RAN INTO OUR SOUL MATE AT WALMART

Craigslist’s “Missed Connections” is a feature of the popular online classifieds site that allows you to post about an encounter you had with someone, in hopes the other person sees the message, responds, and you two fall deeply in love. Where do you think most of these brief, chance happenings occur? Public transportation? Crowded bars? The park? Nope, Walmart. Slate.com put together a chart showing the frequency of locations for Missed Connection posts in America.

THE MOST RIDICULOUS EXCUSES FOR SKIPPING WORK!

For the last 10 years, job listing site CareerBuilder has put out a list it calls “The Most Unbelievable Excuses for Calling in Sick.” Last year an employee said he couldn’t come in because his false teeth flew out the window while he was driving down the highway. Another claimed that someone had glued her windows and doors shut so she couldn’t get out of her house. Here are some of the best for 2014:

• I just put a casserole in the oven.

• My plastic surgery needed some “tweaking” to get it just right.

• I was sitting in the bathroom and my feet and legs fell asleep. When I stood, up I fell and broke my ankle.

• I was at the casino all weekend and still had money left to play with on Monday morning.

• I woke up in a good mood and didn’t want to ruin it.

• I got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store and couldn’t get out.

• I had a gall stone I wanted to heal holistically.

• I caught my uniform on fire by putting it in the microwave to dry.

• I accidentally got on a plane.

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FUN & GAMES

TRIVIA: Every week, over the lunch hour, about 1% of full time workers do this. (Go to an interview for another job)

TRIVIA: Americans eat 2.8 billion pounds of this each year. (Candy. Nearly half of this is chocolate.)

ONE OF US IS LYING!

Each member of your show (from the host on down to the stunt guy) gives out one of the following facts. The first listener to guess who’s lying is the winner.

• The term “couch potato” was coined in July, 1976.

• 85% of total purchases in America are made by women.

• Four billion pencils are manufactured around the world each year. (LIE. It’s closer to 14 billion.)

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JOKE OF THE DAY

Each morning Jake would drive down Oak Street on his way to work. For the past year a pretty hooker standing on one corner gave him the eye as he passed. Now Jake was a good husband and family man and didn’t want to cheat on his wife. But lately the hooker was looking so tempting he couldn’t get her out of his mind. After spending many sleepless nights, Jake went to consult his minister. He told the minister seeing the hooker every day on Oak Street on his way to work was driving him crazy. He’d been married for 27 years and didn’t want to cheat on his wife. “What should I do?” asked Jake. His minister replied, “Take Elm instead.”

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VIDEO OF THE DAY

Baby ‘roo loves the beach.

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IMAGE OF THE DAY

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LAST MINUTE ITEMS

• Two great tools for stunts, promotions and sales in 2015. Here’s one, here’s the other.

• 1980s Wendy’s training video.

• The Walking Drunk.

• Ebola Deeply promises to provide non-alarmist news.

• Bad Lip Reading of The Walking Dead Season 4 (Part II)

• Dozens of movies cleverly tied together by a single basketball.

• A catchy pop song written with iOS 8’s predictive text.

• Somehow no one died in this rally crash.

• Here’s a toy you probably won’t see on one of those annual “hot toys for Christmas” lists.

• The world’s best app!

• It’s 1999. Steve Jobs demonstrates Wi-Fi and the crowd goes nuts.

• What goes through your mind when you show a funny video to a friend.

• The 5 New Skills Today’s On-Air Radio Talent Should Have.

• The Urban Tricycle.

• Watch as a roomful of people condemn five innocent men.

• Innovative cup holder.

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