PRO June 16, 2015

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DATEBOOK: JUNE 16, 2015

This is day 167 of 2015. There are 198 days remaining.

BIRTHDAYS

• Joan Van Ark (Dallas and Knots Landing) is 72

• Laurie Metcalf (Jackie on Roseanne) is 60

• Golfer Phil Mickelson is 45

• John Cho (Harold & Kumar films, Star Trek’s Hikaru Sulu) is 43

• Eddie Cibrian (married to LeAnn Rimes) is 42

• Sibel Kekilli (Game of Thrones) is 35

• Missy Peregrym (Heroes, Rookie Blue) is 33

• Olivia Hack (Cindy in the Brady Bunch films) is 32

• Diana DeGarmo (American Idol third season runner-up) is 28

IT HAPPENED TODAY

• 1858: Abraham Lincoln, paraphrasing a Bible passage, argued that “a house divided against itself cannot stand” in a speech to the state Republican convention in Springfield, Illinois, after he was nominated for the U.S. Senate.

• 1891: The George A. Hormel & Company was founded in Austin, Minnesota. In 1937 it introduced Spam, now the world’s biggest selling canned meat product.

• 1903: Ford Motor Co. was incorporated.

• 1903: A U.S. patent was issued for Chicken Goggles, designed to protect chickens from being pecked in the eyes.

• 1903: A U.S. patent was issued for a soft drink formula called Pepsi-Cola.

• 1929: Otto E. Funk arrived in San Francisco to become the first person to walk across the U.S. playing a violin. 4,165 miles in 183 days.

• 1963: The Soviet Union launched the first female space traveler, Valentina Tereshkova, into orbit aboard Vostok 6.

• 1967: The three-day Monterey International Pop Music Festival — which catapulted Jimi Hendrix, the Who and Janis Joplin to stardom — opened in northern California.

• 1978: The electronic game “Space Invaders” was first demonstrated by Taito Corporation in Tokyo.

• 1987: A jury in New York acquitted Bernhard Goetz of attempted murder in the subway shooting of four young blacks he said were going to rob him; he was convicted of illegal weapons possession.

• 1987: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar signed a two-year contract with the Los Angeles Lakers for $5 million, making him the highest paid player in any sport.

• 1996: Russian voters went to the polls in their first independent presidential election; the result was a runoff between President Boris Yeltsin, the eventual winner, and a Communist challenger.

• 1998: A 40-year-old Florida woman gave birth to a son in the first-ever live birth on the Internet before an audience estimated by a cable health network at two million people.

• 2004: Rebuffing Bush administration claims, the independent commission investigating the Sept. 11 attacks said no evidence existed that al-Qaida had strong ties to Saddam Hussein.

• 2011: New York Rep. Anthony Weiner announced his resignation from Congress, bowing to the furor caused by his sexually charged online dalliances with a former porn actress and other women.

SPECIAL EVENTS

• Fudge Day

• Fresh Veggies Day

UPCOMING

• June 21: Father’s Day (Sunday)

• June 21: Summer begins (Sunday, 12:38PM Eastern)

• July 4: Independence Day (Saturday)

More holidays

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NUMBER FOR THE DAY

25,000: Public high schools in the U.S.

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NEWS ATTACK!

In the UK a 103-year-old man married his 91-year-old girlfriend. [The happy couple was registered at Walgreens.]

U.S. Marines are complaining that their sniper rifles are inferior to the one used by ISIS. [They say that ISIS snipers can fire several rounds before the Marines can even finish packing their weapons with musket balls.]

According to a new study, a dog knows if someone is mistreating his owner, and will react by refusing food offered by that person. [That might be true with some dogs, but my dog would accept treats from Jack the Ripper.]

A teenage North Korean soldier has defected to South Korea. He risked landmines and automatic weapon fire to walk across the border. [Anything to see that new Jurassic World movie.]

On Thursday the pope will release his strongest statement yet about climate change. He’s expected to ask all church followers to take a personal stand. [And the pope is going to do his part to stop releasing dangerous chemicals into the atmosphere. He’s converting hell from fire and brimstone to solar power.]

United Airline passengers are extremely upset. After a Chicago to London flight developed mechanical problems it was routed to Canada where the passengers were housed in a Canadian military base while the airline’s crew stayed in a hotel. The passengers are angry over the poor communication United had with the stranded passengers, the lack of heating on the base, [and the mandatory morning pushups and three-mile hike in full gear.]

There has been a recent rash of UFO reports in Texas, but officials say that it was just unusual cloud formations. [Because I doubt that aliens will invade us in spaceships shaped like giant horsies and duckies.

The woman who was attempting to row solo across the Pacific had to discontinue her journey due to bad weather. [Don’t you just hate it when you leave the house to row solo across the Pacific and then you realize that you forgot your umbrella?]

In Tbilisi, the capital of the eastern European country of Georgia, a massive flood has put the local zoo underwater. [So, they’re changing it to Sea World.]

At New York’s historic Waldorf Astoria hotel a wedding guest’s gun accidentally discharged. [There’s always that one cousin that you regret inviting.]

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NEWS & NUGGETS

NEW YORK PRISON BREAK SEARCH IS COSTING $1 MILLION A DAY _ The search for two convicted killers who escaped from a New York prison is costing $1 million a day.

MAN CHARGED WITH INTENTIONALLY KILLING BALD EAGLES _ An Oregon man has been charged with intentionally driving his pickup truck into a group of bald eagles feeding on an Alaska roadway, killing two of them. Dennis C. Thompson was cited on a count of using a motorized vehicle to harass or molest game. He’s scheduled to be arraigned June 30.

MAKE SURE YOUR EMPLOYEES TAKE VACATION _ There’s a lot of talk about vacation when summer comes, but that hardly means everyone is able to take time off. Two issues prevent employees in the U.S. from taking necessary vacation time: The environment at some companies discourages it, and many employers do not provide paid vacation time. But not taking a vacation hurts employees and hurts the company. Skipping vacation time as a way to climb the corporate ladder faster has been found to be ineffective; a new study has found that employees who take a vacation are more likely to get promoted and get a raise. The study found that employees who take all of their vacation time increase their chances of getting promoted and getting a raise by 6.5 percent, compared with people who leave 11 or more days of paid vacation unused.

… But the benefits are not solely for the workers. If your employees take time off, they will perform better. In the book The Happiness Advantage, research shows that when “the brain can think positively, productivity improves by 31 percent, sales increase by 37 percent, and creativity and revenues can triple.”

THE FAKE BATTLE THAT FOOLED ISIS SUPPORTERS _ A fake battle, invented in a hail of tweets by a London man, tricked both so-called Islamic State’s supporters and their opponents, supporters of Shia militia fighters in Iraq. It was supposedly an intense battle involving Islamic State and Shia and Iraqi government fighters. Soon after the news broke, Twitter users that back anti-IS forces claimed a famous victory. One Twitter user said, “Big celebrations in Karbala after the freedom of Shichwa.” Another claimed “10,000 refugees flee Shichwa to Karbala” and rumors spread that neighboring countries were being dragged into the fighting.

… But the battle of Shichwa never actually happened. In fact, Shichwa isn’t even a real place. The fiction was the work of Ahmad al-Mahmoud, an Iraqi who lives in London and runs a Twitter account called @IraqSurveys. The account usually collates serious news about what’s happening in the country, and has nearly 14,000 followers. But one day, he says, he “got bored”, and he tweeted that Islamic State had withdrawn from Shichwa. He even shared Photoshopped pictures of news outlets which appeared to show the battle being discussed.

… Before he knew it, he had started a trend. Some posted fake news about the fight, and one user even made a map of the battlefield.

POKER PLAYER ENTERS WRONG EVENT, WINS BRACELET _ It’s one thing to outlast hundreds or thousands of poker players to win one of the World Series of Poker’s 68 events and a coveted gold bracelet. It’s another thing entirely to win a game you’ve never played before. Christian Pham of St. Paul, Minnesota, did that Thursday, rising to the top of 219 players by accident. The 40-year-old professional poker player said he intended to play no-limit Texas Hold ’em but instead inadvertently signed up for a different game happening the same day: no-limit deuce-to-seven draw lowball — with a $1,500 buy-in. The goal of the game is to have the lowest poker hand, no straights or flushes, and if a player ends up with a pair, it’s better if it’s a pair of twos. Pham said he didn’t realize his mistake until he was dealt five cards instead of the usual two. He panicked then observed, leaning on helpful players who advised him what beat what. Pham said the guidance from his fellow players at the table helped, and he studied the night in between his rounds. On Friday, he was $81,314 richer.

RACE ACROSS AMERICA STARTS TODAY _ The Race Across America (RAAM), an endurance event billed on its web site as  “the world’s toughest bicycle race,” begins today (Tuesday). Competitors in RAAM, which began in 1982, will travel 3,000 miles from Oceanside, California, to Annapolis, Maryland, crossing 12 states. In addition to teams of two, four, and eight, a total of 41 solo riders are included on the 2015 race roster. Solo racers, who will ride 250-to-350 miles per day, will have a maximum of 12 days to complete their journey.

… The current record for the fastest speed in the event’s history was set in 2014 by an Austrian (Christoph Strasser), who completed the course in seven days, 15 hours, and 56 minutes.

LEGALIZED MEDICAL MARIJUANA DOESN’T INCREASE TEEN USAGE _ One of the biggest worries about legalized medical marijuana was that teenagers would smoke more pot, but it turns out those fears were wrong. A study just published (in The Lancet Psychiatry) showed no significant difference in adolescent marijuana use in the 21 states with medical marijuana laws.

1980S COMPUTER CONTROLS PUBLIC SCHOOL SYSTEM HEAT AND AC _ A 30-year-old computer that has run day and night for decades is what controls the heat and air conditioning at 19 Grand Rapids, Michigan, public schools. The Commodore Amiga was new to Grand Rapids Public Schools in the early 1980s and it has been working tirelessly ever since. The computer is responsible for turning the heat and the air conditioners on and off for 19 school buildings.

… A high school student programmed it when it was installed in the 1980s. Whenever the district has a problem with it, they go back to the original programmer who still lives in the area. If the computer stopped working tomorrow, a staff person would have to turn each building’s climate control systems on and off by hand. A new, more current system would cost between $1.5 and 2 million.

BLIND ATHLETE RUNS MARATHON WITH GPS _ A blind athlete completed a mostly solo marathon in France (Alsace). While he ran with about 200 others, he ran armed with a special GPS device and a white cane. His GPS uses a voice to guide him and is a more accurate version of those typically used on smartphones, giving directions in terms of a clock-based system, such as warning that in 60 meters the path turns off at 3 o’clock.  Researchers say the test run by the 27-year-old athlete was a world first.

… Unfortunately the device malfunctioned during the run, leading the runner to complete the course in three hours and 43 minutes — far off the time he was hoping to achieve.

STOLEN PUPPY TED MYSTERIOUSLY REAPPEARS IN OWNER’S BACKYARD _ A puppy stolen during a break-in in Melbourne, Australia, twelve days ago has mysteriously reappeared in his owner’s backyard. The caramel-colored toy schnoodle, named Ted, was stolen from a house on June 4. Ted’s owner, Ally, returned from a shopping trip Sunday night to find Ted in her backyard. Two laptops and an iPad were also taken in the break-in but Ted was the priority for police.

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WACKY-BUT-TRUE

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: THE SUN HAS NOT EXPLODED _ OnlineAthens.com, the website of the Athens Banner-Herald newspaper in Athens, Georgia, posted an unauthorized updated news item on its front page Monday. The site announced: “This is the emergency broadcast system. Please ignore this message as always. BTW, the sun just exploded, and we’re all about to die.” The story was taken off the site and the paper is investigating.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: VANDAL CAUSES UP TO $100K IN GOLF COURSE DAMAGE _ An Ohio teenage vandal is accused of causing $70,000 to $100,000 in damage to Aston Oaks Golf Course over the weekend. Sheriff’s deputies (in Hamilton County) responded to the golf course early Sunday morning for a report of damage to the fairways and tee boxes. They found the 19-year-old’s 2002 Ford Explorer in a creek on the property and found him at his home a short time later. They say he confessed to driving onto the golf course and doing donuts before crashing into the creek.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: HAND DRYER SPRAYS MAN IN URINE, RESTAURANT RESPONDS _ Imagine the scene: you have just enjoyed a meal at a restaurant and decide to pay a visit to the bathroom when the automatic hand dryer goes off, causing a severe case of splashback. That’s what happened to Scotland’s Gordie Wallace when he popped into the little boy’s room at a burger joint. One minute, he was doing his thing, the next he had inadvertently activated the hand dryer. Since posting an image to the burger joint’s Facebook page on Sunday, Gordie’s toilet troubles have been shared thousands of times, accumulating more than 18,000 ‘likes’ and hundreds of comments.

… On Monday, Handmade Burger Co. apologized to Gordie and offered him a new pair of shoes and a year’s supply of fresh socks.

WACKY-BUT-TRUE: THIEF PASSED OUT HAD PACKAGE OF BACON IN HIS POCKET _ A man arrested on suspicion of burglary over the weekend is accused of only taking two items from a Lincoln, Nebraska, home. Police said Justin Morris was found passed out on the front lawn of the home early Saturday. Next to him was a 42-inch flat-screen TV, while a package of bacon was found in his pocket.

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ON TELEVISION

AMERICA’S GOT TALENT (8p ET, NBC) — The auditions continue in this new, 2-hour edition. The action moves outside as the dangerous and extreme acts audition.

NCIS (8p ET, CBS) — Repeat

JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE (8p ET, ABC) — New

2015 FIFA WOMEN’S WORLD CUP (8p ET, FOX) — The US women take on Nigeria in the teams’ final opening round contest in Group D.

THE FLASH (8p ET, CW) — Repeat

NBA LIVE (8:30p ET, ABC) — Pregame show

NBA FINALS (9p ET, ABC) — The Golden State Warriors are in Cleveland for Game 6.

NCIS: NEW ORLEANS (9p ET, CBS) — Repeat

iZOMBIE (9p ET, CW) — Repeat

SEASON PREMIERE: RIZZOLI AND ISLES (9p ET, TNT) — Season 6 kicks off tonight.

48 HOURS (10p ET, CBS) — Repeat

I CAN DO THAT (10p ET, NBC) — In this new edition, the celebrities perform with the stage company of Avenue Q, the dance team Pilobolus and the martial-arts stunt group Board Breakers.

ROYAL PAINS (10p ET, USA) — Ed Weeks (The Mindy Project) guest stars in this new episode.

SERIES PREMIERE: PROOF (10p ET, TNT) — This new drama about life after death and near death experiences stars Jennifer Beals and Matthew Modine. Kyra Sedgwick executive produces.

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ENTERTAINMENT

JURASSIC WORLD IS UNDISPUTED BIGGEST BOX OFFICE OPENER _ The Avengers have been stomped at the domestic box office. A little over three years after Marvel’s superhero team-up hit a $207.4 million U.S. opening weekend for a box office record that looked like it could stand for a long, long time, Jurassic World swooped in and nipped it with $208.8 million, according to final numbers released Monday. Sunday estimates had Jurassic World coming in at $204.6 million, but that number often flexes up or down after the final tally. In this case, it came up just enough to stand as the biggest U.S. opening of all time.

… Preliminary numbers already had Jurassic World as the largest worldwide release at $511 million, and that figure soared higher as well — it will go into the record books with a $524.4 million global bow.

KRISTEN STEWART NOT DATING HER FEMALE ASSISTANT, MOM SAYS _ Kristen Stewart is or isn’t dating her female assistant despite a report that she definitely is dating her female assistant — got that? UK’s The Mirror quotes Stewart’s mom, Hollywood script supervisor Jules Stewart, as saying that 25-year-old Kristen is dating her assistant, Alicia Cargile: Jules reportedly said, “What’s not to be accepting about her now having a girlfriend? She’s happy.” But in Us Weekly, Jules says it’s all hype: “Never ever did we discuss Kristen! … I said, ‘Yes, she’s a lovely girl, but that’s all.'” But a Mirror journalist is taking exception to Jules’ remarks and plans to upload audio of the interview.

BOBBI KRISTINA GOING HOME? _ Bobbi Kristina Brown may be headed home — but if the report is true, it won’t be her own decision. The 22-year-old daughter of Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown has not responded to medical care since January 31. On that date, Bobbi Kristina was found unconscious in the home she shared with Nick Gordon, after she spent time in a hospital and care facility. And although irreversible brain damage means that she can never recover, Bobbi Kristina’s relatives want to take her home to let her die in a familiar environment. A source says, “[She] is being taken home to die peacefully.”

… However, Bobby Brown is opposed to taking Bobbi Kristina home. But he’s no longer in sole charge of her medical decisions after a judge ruled that he is co-guardian with Pat Houston, who reportedly wants to take her to the home that she shared first with Whitney Houston and then with Nick Gordon.

AMY SCHUMER LEFT A $500 TIP AT A LONG ISLAND CLAM BAR _ Over the weekend, Amy Schumer took time away from activities like photobombing engagement photos and just generally being everyone’s favorite in order to get a bite at Peter’s Clam Bar on Long Island, New York, where she got into a conversation with her server, Ryan. Apparently, Ryan at some point mentioned that working at Peter’s Clam Bar is one of two jobs he needs in order to afford college. Schumer was also a waitress herself back in the day, so when she got her $49 bill, she just penciled in a 1,000 percent tip.

ED SHEERAN SINGS WITH A FAN _ Ed Sheeran was at a mall in Canada Sunday when he heard a girl singing his tune Thinkin’ Out Loud. So he jumped on-stage and joined her for a duet. The girl was 13-year-old Sydney Bourbeau, who was performing as part of her music school’s fundraiser for the Edmonton Humane Society. Ed, who was shopping with a friend at the time, decided to surprise the girl onstage. The crowd erupted in cheers and Sydney was completely shocked, but she kept right on singing. • VIDEO

SCHWARZENEGGER NOW GIVES TURN-BY-TURN GPS DIRECTIONS _ Arnold Schwarzenegger will provide turn-by-turn directions as his character from the Terminator franchise for the navigation app Waze. The stint is a part of the promotion for Terminator Genisys. In addition to directions, drivers can expect an “hasta la vista, baby” at the end of each trip, along with some other classic Schwarzenegger phrases.

… Waze is a popular navigation app which Google bought in June 2013. What sets Waze apart from other navigation apps is its crowd-sourced data: users share data about traffic, road hazards and police and the app routes drivers accordingly.

PITCH PERFECT 3 IS ON THE WAY _ The rumors about a Pitch Perfect 3 movie were confirmed on Monday. However, fans of the movie will have to wait more than two years to view the film. Pitch Perfect 3 has a July 2017 release date. Anna Kendrick confirmed her participation in Pitch Perfect 3 via Instagram, in a post that shows Kendrick winking and holding up three fingers.

… Rebel Wilson will also be back for her role as “fat Amy”.

FULL (WEIRD) TRAILER FOR KRISTEN AND WILL’S ‘A DEADLY ADOPTION’ _ The full trailer for the Kristen Wiig-Will Ferrell made-for-TV movie, A Deadly Adoption, was released Monday, and it’s not quite clear if this is a parody of Lifetime movies or a real one. There aren’t any laughs, but all the hallmarks of a Lifetime movie are there: unhinged women, people uttering the words “I’m scared,” love triangles, vague menace.

… Back on April 1 (wink), it was revealed Wiig and Ferrell were making this “secret” movie. The next day, Ferrell issued a statement, saying, “We are deeply disappointed that our planned top-secret project was made public,” adding that it’d been scrapped and that it was “in the best interest for everyone to forgo the project entirely.” A Deadly Adoption debuts Saturday (June 20) on Lifetime. • TRAILER

BEVERLY HILLS, 90210 GETTING UNAUTHORIZED TV MOVIE TREATMENT _ If Saved by the Bell got one and Full House is getting one, then it follows that ’90s TV series Beverly Hills, 90210 would get one, too. Soon, the Lifetime network will be entertaining viewers with all the juicy, behind-the-scenes drama that played out on the set of the Aaron Spelling-produced Fox teen drama, which first starting airing in October 1990.

… The original series made stars of Jason Priestley and Shannen Doherty, who played new-to-town siblings Brandon and Brenda Walsh, as well as Jennie Garth, Ian Ziering, Luke Perry, Tori Spelling and more. The Unauthorized Beverly Hills, 90120 Story does not yet have a projected air date.

ZOE SALDANA EXPLAINS WHY SHE WON’T SHOW HER TWINS’ FACES ONLINE _ Still waiting to see the adorable faces of Zoe Saldana’s twins? You’re going to have to wait a little longer. Zoe explains: “I just don’t want 16 years from now to get ‘You are so disrespectful. You invaded, you exposed me and I wasn’t ready.’ Even though they’re babies and they’re under our care, it’s still their face.” She says, “Right now, they’re not in the position to speak for themselves or make a decision… I don’t want to make it for them.”

JANET JACKSON TO KICK OFF ‘UNBREAKABLE’ WORLD TOUR IN AUGUST _ Janet Jackson will embark on her Unbreakable world tour in August. The 49-year-old singer announced the tour dates and locations on her website Monday. Jackson will kick off August 31 in Vancouver, British Columbia, and bring the tour to a close November 12 in Honolulu, Hawaii.

… The Unbreakable tour is in support of her upcoming 11th studio album, which will debut in the fall.

POLICE DEPT. HELPS TEEN BATTLING CANCER MEET TAYLOR SWIFT _ A police department in Dover, Delaware, went beyond their typical call of duty last weekend when they helped a 13-year-old girl with cancer attend a Taylor Swift concert. In December 2014, Victoria Marsh was diagnosed with a rare form of bone cancer. Because of her chemotherapy treatments, doctors couldn’t allow Marsh to attend Taylor Swift’s concert in Philadelphia on June 13. The teen, who also has Down syndrome, had to give up the concert tickets that the Dover Police Department had sent her, choosing to send her supportive sisters in her place. But the persistent police offers didn’t stop there. The department helped Marsh create a video that told her inspiring story. Using the hashtags #TeamVictoria and #SwiftAWish, the video plea went viral. After 45,000 views on YouTube and 56,000 shares on Facebook, the teen’s dream came true. On the night of Swift’s concert in Philadelphia, Marsh was cleared by her doctors to leave her hospital room for eight hours, which meant she not only got to see the show — she got the chance to meet the singer backstage as well.

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BITS & BREAKS

BY THE NUMBERS: FATHER’S DAY

The idea of Father’s Day was conceived more than a century ago by Sonora Dodd of Spokane, Washington, while she listened to a Mother’s Day sermon in 1909. Dodd wanted a special day to honor her father, William Smart, a widowed Civil War veteran who was left to raise his six children on a farm. A day in June was chosen for the first Father’s Day celebration — June 19, 1910, proclaimed by Spokane’s mayor because it was the month of Smart’s birth. The first presidential proclamation honoring fathers was issued in 1966 when President Lyndon Johnson designated the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day. Father’s Day has been celebrated annually since 1972 when President Richard Nixon signed the public law that made it permanent.

• According to the National Retail Federation, spending for dad is expected to reach $12.7 billion for golf lessons, home improvement tools, coffee mugs and more.

• Also according to the NRF, the average person will spend $115.57 on gifts.

• 7,400: The number of men’s clothing stores around the country.

• 15,000: The number of hardware stores. Additionally, there are about 6,700 home centers.

• 21,000: Number of sporting goods stores.

• 214,000: Estimated number of stay-at-home dads

NEW ON DVD TODAY

METAL FANS ARE THE LEAST LIKELY TO CHEAT

According to a survey (by Mirror U.K.), heavy metal fans are the least likely fans to cheat on their significant others. The survey consisted of over 6,500 music fans being questioned. Here is the genre of music, followed by how likely somebody is to cheat based on liking that genre of music:

• Jazz: 19%

• Salsa: 14%

• Pop: 13%

• Country: 12%

• Rap: 9%

• Classical music: 8%

• Blues: 6%

• Reggae: 5%

• Rock and roll: 5%

• Electronica: 4%

• Indie: 3%

• Heavy metal: 2%

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FUN & GAMES

TRIVIA: 1 in 109 Americans have this kind of name. (Unisex. Like Casey or Drew.)

MYSTERY VOICE

Question: Name this TV star.

Answer: Marg Helgenberger » download page

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JOKE OF THE DAY

The CIA loses track of one of its operatives and calls in one of its top spy hunters. The CIA boss says, “All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he’s somewhere in Ireland. If you think you’ve located him, say to him, ‘The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning’. If it’s really him, he’ll answer, ‘Yes, and for mist at noon as well’.” So the spy hunter goes to Ireland and stops in a bar in one of the small towns. He says to the bartender, “Maybe you can help me. I’m looking for a guy named Murphy.” The bartender replies, “You’re going to have to be more specific because, around here, there are lots of guys named Murphy. There’s Murphy the Baker, who runs the pastry shop on the next block. There’s Murphy the Banker, who’s president of our local savings bank. There’s Murphy the Blacksmith, who works at the stables. And, as a matter of fact, my name is Murphy, too.” Hearing this, the spy hunter figures he might as well try the code on bartender, so he says, “The weather forecast calls for mist in the morning.” The bartender replies, “Oh, you’re looking for Murphy the Spy. He lives right down the street.”

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VIDEO OF THE DAY

Bosnian guys playing Frisbee (not).

BONUS VIDEO OF THE DAY

Drunk groom does not impress bride.

https://youtu.be/0JfluV8vUes

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IMAGE OF THE DAY

Cowboy sandals.

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LAST MINUTE ITEMS

• Real-time cyber-attack threat map.

• Play classic Atari games in your web browser.

• Where is the International Space Station right now?

• If the iPhone had been created in 1987.

• The final Jurassic World trailer is pretty terrifying.

Windows 93

• Ex-lovers meet each other for the first time after 30 years.

• How well can you hear audio quality?

• Mac users: get the fantastic Forecast Bar.

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DATEBOOK: JUNE 17, 2015

This is day 168 of 2015. There are 197 days remaining.

BIRTHDAYS

• Politician, historian, author and political consultant Newt Gingrich is 72

• Barry Manilow is 72

• Joe Piscopo is 64

• Mark Linn-Baker (Perfect Strangers) is 61

• Director Bobby Farrelly (There’s Something About Mary) is 57

• Thomas Haden Church (Sideways, Wings) is 54

• Greg Kinnear is 52

• Kami Cotler (Elizabeth Walton on The Waltons) is 50

• Jason Patric is 49

• Will Forte (Saturday Night Live) is 45

• Tennis star Venus Williams is 35

IT HAPPENED TODAY

• 1870: George Cormack was born in Scotland. In 1924, working in the U.S., he invented Wheaties.

• 1885: The Statue of Liberty arrived in New York Harbor.

• 1972: Five White House operatives were arrested for burglarizing the offices of the Democratic National Committee, in an attempt by some members of the Republican party to illegally wiretap the opposition.

• 1976: What remained of the American Basketball Association, the Nets, Pacers, Nuggets, and Spurs, merged into the NBA.

• 1990: After eight days of work, 12 students in Singapore completed a pyramid built with 263,810 bottle caps.

• 1994: Following a televised low-speed highway chase and a failed attempt at suicide, O.J. Simpson was arrested for the murders of his wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend Ronald Goldman.

• 2001: After routinely tardy students claimed they didn’t have alarm clocks, St. James’ Primary School in Gorton, England, handed out free alarm clocks to any students that wanted them.

• 2004: An Alabama hen named Matilda was certified by Guinness World Records as the world’s oldest living chicken. She was 14 at the time, almost double the normal lifespan of a chicken. Matilda worked in a magic act.

• 2008: An Orlando, Florida, man was taken into custody after the pickup he was driving was found to have a hidden 800-gallon tank custom-welded into the back to steal fuel. Investigators said a gas station attendant called police and said the driver of a white Ford pickup looked suspicious and lingered too long at the pump. When officers checked the man’s vehicle, they found a fuel tank professionally welded and hidden inside. The man also had a key that disabled pump meters.

SPECIAL EVENTS

• Eat Your Vegetables Day

UPCOMING

• June 21: Father’s Day (Sunday)

• June 21: Summer begins (Sunday, 12:38PM Eastern)

• July 4: Independence Day (Saturday)

More holidays

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