DATEBOOK: NOVEMBER 15, 2021
• Sam Waterston (Law and Order) is 81
• Beverly D’Angelo (National Lampoon’s Vacation) is 70
• Jonny Lee Miller (Elementary, Eli Stone) is 49
• Sean Murray (Timothy McGee on NCIS) is 44
• Winston Duke (M’Baku in Marvel films) is 35
• Shailene Woodley (The Descendants, The Fault in Our Stars) is 30
IT HAPPENED TODAY
• 1492: In history’s first written reference to a new discovery, Christopher Columbus made notes in his journal about the use by New World Indians of tobacco.
• 1969: Dave Thomas opened the first Wendy’s fast food restaurant in Columbus, Ohio.
• 1990: Producers acknowledged that Milli Vanilli, who won the 1990 “Best New Artist” Grammy Award, did not sing on their album.
• 1992: Richard Petty drove in the final auto race of his 35-year career.
• 2003: Mourners at a funeral chapel in Belgium were gathered around the coffin of their loved one when a cell phone started ringing inside the casket. Relatives filed a complaint against the undertaker, charging he could not have prepared their relative’s body properly if he left a phone inside his pocket.
• 2013: The new number one activity on the Internet became social media, overtaking porn.
• 2015: Holly Holm defeated UFC Champion Ronda Rousey in an upset in Melbourne, Australia.
• 2017: Country singer Blake Shelton controversially wins People Magazine’s sexiest man alive award.
• 2019: Joker, starring Joaquin Phoenix, became the first R-rated film to earn $1 billion worldwide.
• 2020: Donald Trump tweeted [Biden] “won because the election was rigged” while still refusing to concede the election.
• Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day
• Raisin Bran Cereal Day
• America Recycles Day
• Philanthropy Day
• I Love to Write Day
5,000: Miles of toll roads in the U.S.
An Amazon delivery truck in Wisconsin was cut in half by a train. [“Dear valued Amazon customer: Due to their inadvertent separation you will receiving one of your socks within 48 hours and the other in a week to ten days.”]
A study finds that one in three American parents spank their kids, way down from 50 percent in 1993. [That’s because all the kids got smart and lawyered up.]
According to a survey, male nurses are far more macho than the average guy. [Which explains that hot new video game, Call of Duty: Operation Sponge Bath.]
A study in India found that camel milk has a vitamin C content three times higher than cow’s milk and that using camel milk in ice cream, tea and coffee can help reduce blood sugar levels. [Camel ice cream is high in calories, so order your cone with one hump, not two.]
A relationship expert says the stress of the holiday season, along with excess alcohol, leads to more cheating spouses. [One sign he’s cheating: the family’s Continue Watching section has romance flicks you’ve never seen with him.]
A college student held up a sign during ESPN’s College GameDay that asked people to send him beer money — and they did. [I’m gonna try that at my kid’s (soccer / football) game this weekend. My sign will read, “Send me money to put my kid through college ‘cause he’s not getting an athletic scholarship.”]
Thanksgiving is days away. [Here’s a Thanksgiving tip: If you don’t want to be obvious when you open your pants at the table, time it for when grandpa passes gas.]
Researchers (Center for Preventative Cardiology at the University of Maryland Medical Center) discovered that people who laugh are less likely to have heart disease than people who don’t. [So if you want to keep from having a heart attack, exercise, watch your weight and avoid watching Seth Rogen movies.]
AUTHORITIES ID THE MAN BEHIND INFAMOUS 52-YEAR-OLD BANK HEIST _ After more than 50 years, the man responsible for one of the most notorious bank robberies in Ohio history has been identified. Theodore John Conrad was only 20 years old when he robbed the Society National Bank in Cleveland on July 11, 1969. Conrad worked as a teller at the bank, and on the day of the robbery he stashed $215,000 — or around $1.7 million in 2021 dollars — in a paper bag and simply walked out the door. Because the robbery happened on a Friday, the bank was not aware of anything amiss until the following Monday morning, when they checked the vault and found the money gone.
… Conrad, unsurprisingly, did not show up for work that Monday. He had a two-day head-start on law enforcement, and managed to avoid capture for 52 years. It wasn’t until earlier this month that U.S. Marshals based in Cleveland discovered that a man named Thomas Randele was, in fact, Conrad. Randele lived in Lynnfield, Massachusetts, and had been living in a suburban neighborhood since the 1970s until he died of lung cancer in May at the age of 71.
… The Marshals said they made the discovery after matching paperwork that Conrad had filled out in the 1960s with documents that Randele had filled out later in life — including a 2014 filing for bankruptcy.
… According to the Marshals, Conrad’s heist was inspired in part by the 1968 Steve McQueen film The Thomas Crown Affair. The movie follows a high-powered businessman who pulls off a bank heist for the fun of it. Conrad watched the movie a half dozen times the year before the robbery. After watching the movie, he told friends that he believed it would be easy to rob a bank and that he planned to do so. His friends never believed him at the time. One friend, Russell Metcalf, had even had lunch with Conrad on the day of the robbery.
… In Massachusetts, Conrad began a new life as a car salesman and taught golf lessons. He also got married and had a child.
THANKSGIVING LANDS IN THE MIDDLE _ This year, Thanksgiving falls on November 25 — right in the middle of the earliest and latest it can be. The earliest date that Thanksgiving can occur on is November 22; the latest is November 28.
WOMAN MEETS BIRTH FAMILY 45 YEARS AFTER GOING MISSING _ Her whole life, 47-year-old Denise McCarty thought she was abandoned as a baby. It turns out she actually got lost at a busy and crowded outdoor market in South Korea, and her birth family has been searching for her ever since. Then a year ago McCarty, who has lived in Vermont since being adopted by an American family in 1976, took a DNA test and discovered her family. After a very emotional virtual reunion last year, McCarty traveled to South Korea in September to meet her birth family in person.
… On her trip she met her mom, aunts and uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews, and in-laws. McCarty says during her 12-day visit, she and her family feasted during a traditional Korean holiday, laughed and joked around, and celebrated her birthday — which she celebrated with her twin.
… The best gift: McCarty says she’s thankful her mother finally got the peace of mind she has been searching for for four decades. McCarty plans to visit her Korean family once a year.
MILITARY DAD DISGUISES HIMSELF AS A BUCK TO SURPRISE HIS PARENTS _ A video posted to TikTok by user Hannah Jo Hosick shows how she helped pull off the ultimate surprise for her grandparents when she told them she’d just shot a big buck and led them out to her truck to take a look at her prize. As they walk to the truck you can see the deer’s antlers sticking out of the truck bed. But when the grandparents looked inside, it wasn’t a 12 point buck they saw — it was their son (and Hannah’s dad) dressed in camo and holding up a pair of antlers, home from a 12-month deployment. • LINK
GIRL, TEDDY BEAR REUNITED A YEAR AFTER LOSS IN GLACIER PARK _ A little girl who lost a special teddy bear she’d had since being adopted from an Ethiopian orphanage thought it was gone forever when she forgot it along a trail in Glacier National Park last year. But thanks to perseverance and a bit of luck, the teddy bear is back in the arms of 6-year-old Naomi Pascal in Jackson, Wyoming.
… Teddy was the first gift Ben and Addie Pascal sent to Naomi before she was adopted in 2016. She took Teddy with her on family trips to Ethiopia, Rwanda, Croatia and Greece. When Pascal took his kids to Montana in October 2020, Teddy was once again along for the adventure. He was accidentally dropped on a trail and by the time the family realized Teddy was gone it was too late — it snowed overnight, making it impossible to find Teddy.
… It wasn’t too long before Ranger Tom Mazzarisi spotted the stuffed bear, soaking wet and sitting in melting snow while he and two others were doing some end-of-season work. Teddy “hibernated” in Mazzarisi’s cabin and when Mazzarisi returned to work in April of this year he “immediately put him on the dash of my patrol truck.” Teddy had a busy spring and summer tagging along with Mazzarisi.
… In late September a family friend returned to Glacier for some hiking and photography and spotted a bear on the dash of a ranger’s truck. Unfortunately, the ranger’s truck was locked. It was Mazzarisi’s day off and another ranger who was working on the trail had the keys. They left a note on the vehicle and found other rangers. They knew about the bear, confirmed where it had been found and soon returned Teddy to Hayden along with a junior park ranger badge and a ranger hat. The family friend shipped the bear to Naomi.
RARE PENGUIN WANDERS 1,900 MILES FROM ANTARCTICA TO NEW ZEALAND _ A rare penguin wandered nearly 2,000 miles from Antarctica to New Zealand. Named “Pingu” by locals, he’s just the third Adélie penguin ever found on New Zealand. The breed lives only on the Antarctic peninsula — at least 1,864 miles away. Harry Singh was walking with his wife on the beach south of Christchurch when they encountered the exhausted animal. Singh called penguin rescuers, who revived Pingu, and plan to release him on a beach free of dogs.
AMAZON DELIVERY VAN CUT IN HALF BY AMTRAK TRAIN _ Residents of the outlying communities west of Milwaukee might have to wait a little longer to receive packages from Amazon. An Amazon delivery van was bisected by an Amtrak train after the train collided with the rear section of the van at a railway crossing (in Ixonia). Thankfully, the driver of the van and everyone aboard the train was relatively unharmed after the incident.
… The driver departed a residence on a small access road that parallels the railroad track until it terminates at a T-shaped junction with a public road. The junction with the public road, named River Valley Road, is also adjacent to a railroad crossing. This is a crossing with no signal or lights. Alexander Evans, the driver, was unaware of the Amtrak track approaching the crossing from the same direction. Evans made a left-hand turn onto the crossing. He is also deaf in his left ear, so he didn’t hear the train’s blaring horn until the last moments before impact.
OLE MISS STUDENT MAKES INSANE MONEY WITH ‘NEED BEER MONEY’ SIGN _ When College GameDay announced that it was returning to Oxford, Mississippi for the second time ever, Jack Gililland knew exactly what to do. He was going to follow the legends who had come before him and cash-in on the TV exposure. And he sure did. As a sophomore at Ole Miss, triple majoring in entrepreneurship, real estate, and marketing, he doesn’t have much time to do anything outside of the classroom. But he needed some beer money.
… Gililland, who has watched College GameDay for as long as he can remember, saw people with signs that said things like “hey mom, send beer money” with their Venmo usernames attached. He had seen them be extremely successful in the past and, being of entrepreneurial mindset, decided to try it out himself. After spending $5 for a poster and a marker at Walmart, Gililland crafted his simple, but bold and eye-catching sign. It read “NEED BEER MONEY $,” with his Venmo listed below. While a sign was good, it wasn’t enough: He knew that he had to get on TV for it to work and he camped out all night to be one of the first people in the crowd. It worked. He was.
… His first Venmo came in about 15 minutes after College GameDay started. Gililland says that his first TV appearance could not have lasted more than 10 seconds. It made him $850. From there, as the show went on, the money kept stacking up. As of 12PM on Sunday, just over 24 hours since the show came to an end, Gililland racked up more than $4,000.
… For every dollar that comes in, 25 percent will be donated to a local charity. With the rest of the money, he is undoubtedly going to have a few cold ones. But he also has plans to use it as an investment.
FBI SERVER HACKED AS 100,000 GET FAKE EMAILS _ At least 100,000 emails were sent from FBI servers in an apparent hack of the federal agencies servers. The emails warned recipients that their information may be under attack from hacker Vinny Troia, who owns the cybersecurity company Night Lion Security. The emails reportedly also referenced TheDarkOverlord, a cybercriminal group on which Troia published research early this year. The email signed off as having come from the Department of Homeland Security’s Cyber Threat Detection and Analysis Group, which hasn’t existed for at least two years. The FBI released a statement confirming the incident.
76-YEAR-OLD MAN COLLECTS SCRAP METAL TO FEED STRAY CATS EVERY SINGLE DAY _ Willie Ortiz is a 76-year-old man, a veteran and a scrap metal collector from Hartford, Connecticut. He has been feeding stray cats in his area for 22 years, not missing a single day. Despite rain, snow or freezing cold, he still goes out, collects scrap metal to pay for the food and cat supplies. Willie cares for them, feeding them each night as well as spraying and neutering them so the stray population doesn’t grow out of control.
… He started feeding for the stray cats after he saw people ignoring a hungry kitten begging for food. Every morning Willie drives around collecting scraps to sell, and every evening he leaves his home with tins of sardines and cat food, feeds the cats, and checks on their health. Not only does Willie feed the cats every day, he cares for the injured or sick cats and bring them in to get the medical care they need. Although his job is very difficult, Willie says that it is his life and it makes him truly happy. Willie says he will continue feeding the cats for as long as he can.
AN INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT FEATURES SAD MCDONALD’S BURGERS _ If you’ve ever ordered a McDonald’s burger expecting poster perfection, but instead ended up with a sad hot mess, you’re not alone. On Instagram, the saddest burgers of any persuasion can be found on @mcsenget, an account that has been quietly documenting hilariously misaligned McDonald’s menu items.
… The name Mcsenget is a portmanteau of “McDonald’s” and “senget,” Malaysian for “tilted,” a reference to the floppy burgers found across Singapore, where the account was created.
… Ben Chia, one of Mcsenget’s founding members, said the account was created about five years ago, when he and his friends used to frequent McDonald’s after band practice. They got “very annoyed [that] when we order Filet-O-Fish — specifically Filet-O-Fish — it tends to be senget. • LINK
OBVIOUS: HOW TO LIVE LONGER _ Well, this seems like a no-brainer. Canadian researchers found that the secret to a long and healthy life lies in avoiding weight gain and keeping active. Researcher found men who have normal blood pressure, good grip strength and other traits at midlife had a higher chance of staying healthy in old age.
A YEAR AGO THIS WEEK: WHAT FUELS OUR ROAD TRIPS _ A writer for the Arizona Republic newspaper (Karina Bland) asked: What fuels your road trips? Some of the responses:
• Teriyaki beef jerky and orange Gatorade
• Chocolate-covered Donut Gems and coffee
• Funyuns and Diet Coke
• Twizzlers and Diet Coke
• Ruffles and Coca-Cola
🗣 TOPIC: What food fuels your family’s road trips?
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: GUY INVOICES WOMAN FOR COFFEE AFTER SHE TURNS DOWN SECOND DATE _ A woman was left stunned after a man she was seeing invoiced her. Lauren went on a date with a man to a coffee shop before she ultimately decided there wasn’t a spark and she tried to cut things off. But she wasn’t expecting him to ask her to send him the money for the coffee he paid for during the date.
… On the anniversary of the exchange, Lauren — who lived in London at the time — shared screenshots of the chat to her Twitter account, where she wrote: “Six years since that lad tried to invoice me for a s**t date.” In the picture, you see the man saying it had been good to see her that evening and asking whether she’d like to go out again. • IMAGE
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: BAND APOLOGIZES AFTER LEAD SINGER PEES ON FAN’S FACE MID-SHOW _ (CAUTION!) Brass Against, a band known for performing brass versions of rock songs, has issued an apology after its lead singer peed on a fan’s face at a festival in Daytona Beach last week. Yes, you read that right. During a set on Thursday night, singer Sophia Urista pulled down her pants on stage and peed on a (surprisingly willing) fan mid-song. On Friday, the band posted an apology on Twitter, assuring fans that it wasn’t a planned stunt. The tweet read: “We had a great time last night at Welcome to Rockville. Sophia got carried away. That’s not something the rest of us expected, and it’s not something you’ll see again at our shows. Thanks for bringing it last night, Daytona.”
… During the performance, Urista grabbed a bottle of water, and noted that the show would be closed out with her relieving herself on someone in the audience once she drank it all. She announced: “Get my man with the can on his head ready, ’cause we’re going to bring him onstage and I’ma pi** in [his] mouth.” A few minutes later, the man indeed climbed onto the stage, with an apparently empty can attached to his forehead. He laid down flat on his back on stage, prompting Urista to straddle his head, slide her pants down, and pee into the can — or at least, aim for it. After getting her pants pulled back up, Urista walked back over to him, telling him to get off the stage and calling for security to help her out.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MOUNTAIN LION DESTROYS DEER DECOY _ While we don’t know exactly where it took place, a trail cam caught what happens when a mountain lion decides to strike its prey. Fortunately for the victim the target happened to be a decoy. • VIDEO
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: FAKE HITMAN WEBSITE FOOLS WOMAN _ A real woman tried to hire a hitman on a fake website. Wendy Lynn Wein found Rent-A-Hitman online and filled out a form asking for help killing her ex-husband. Unfortunately for Wein and perhaps fortunately for her ex, that site is owned not by a hitman but computer professional Bob Innes who initially launched it in 2005 to promote a hacking prevention business. Years later he started checking the site’s inbox and found a lot of disturbing requests not related to that business. Since then, he’s made the site into an obvious joke, and, when he gets requests, he turns them over to police That’s what he did with Wein, who used a pseudonym but used real contact information. Wein put in her service request on the site that her ex had stolen $20,000 from her, and said she didn’t want to commit the crime herself. Innes forwarded that to Michigan State Police, who posed as people affiliated with the site. She gave a detective her ex’s address and told them when and where he works, and a $200 down payment on the $5,000 tab for the murder.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: WOMAN JUMPS INTO LION EXHIBIT, DANCES, THROWS $100 BILLS IN AIR _ A barrier separates visitors and lions at New York’s Bronx Zoo, but it didn’t stop one woman from jumping in the enclosure. Wearing a blonde wig and holding a bouquet of roses, the woman danced, shouted at the lions, and threw $100 dollar bills in the air. Believed to be Brooklyn animal lover Myah Autry, the woman has previously pulled similar stunts.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: MAN CHARGED IN SCAM MISSED COURT BECAUSE HE’S DEAD _ A man charged with running a scam that cheated a woman out of more than $80,000 missed a recent court date and was supposed to be rearrested, but his attorney says that will be impossible because his client has been dead for months. Johnny Masesa’s attorney told state’s attorneys in June that he received a death certificate saying his client died from complications of malaria in the Democratic Republic of Congo, where he has family. Police and federal authorities have been unable to confirm the authenticity of the death certificate.
WACKY-BUT-TRUE: SAUDI ARABIA GRANTS CITIZENSHIP TO ROBOT SOPHIA _ Saudi Arabia claims to be the first country to have granted citizenship to a robot. But the decision has garnered mockery from social media users as the robot may have more rights than human women in the kingdom. Saudi Arabia claims to be the first nation to bestow citizenship upon a robot. Sophia was built by the Hong Kong-based company Hanson Robotics in 2015. The inventor David Hanson claims that the robot has artificial intelligence and can recognize faces. The robot’s silicon face can reportedly mimic 62 human facial expressions. Hanson is evidently proud of his robot creation’s looks, as he described Sophia on his website: “Porcelain skin, a slender nose, high cheekbones, an intriguing smile and deeply expressive eyes.” She was supposedly modeled on the late actress Audrey Hepburn.
… Sophia was interviewed onstage in a stilted conversation at the Future Investment Initiative conference. During the talk, the panel moderator told Sophia that he had received breaking news that she was to be granted citizenship. Sophia responded: “Thank you to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. I am very honored and proud for this unique distinction. It is historic to be the first robot in the world to be recognized with citizenship.” The announcement was confirmed in a statement by Saudi Arabia’s Culture and Information Ministry, though it did not explain what benefits would be bestowed upon the robot. Saudi citizens are entitled to generous sums each year as part of the kingdom’s substantial oil revenues. Citizenship is rarely granted to foreigners, and is most notably withheld from poorly treated migrant laborers.
… Social media users in the kingdom were quick to point out that the robot could be entitled to more rights than the country’s female subjects, who must have a male guardian, must wear a hijab, cannot mix with unrelated males and are unfairly represented in the justice system. They were only recently granted permission to drive.
THE VOICE (8p ET, NBC) — New. The top 13 perform.
DANCING WITH THE STARS (8p ET, ABC) — New. Two more celebs will be eliminated in the semi-finals.
9-1-1 (8p ET, FOX) — New. An explosion rocks the hospital where Dr. Hale is performing surgery.
MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL (8p ET, ESPN) — The San Francisco 49ers (3-5) take on the Los Angeles Rams (7-2).
THE BIG LEAP (9p ET, FOX) — New. Paula and Mike decide to take a giant leap in their relationship.
4400 (9p ET, CW) — New.
THE GOOD DOCTOR (10p ET, ABC) — New. Shaun and Alex must decide between saving one patient over another.
ORDINARY JOE (10p ET, NBC) — New. Music Joe struggles to support Amy through a devastating loss.
BOX OFFICE _ Disney and Marvel’s Eternals took a steep drop in its second weekend in theaters, but it’s still hanging on to first place. Eternals added $27.5 million over the weekend, bringing its North American total to $119 million.
… One year ago this week the number one movie was Freaky.
… Five years ago this week: Doctor Strange
… Ten years ago this week: Immortals
… Twenty years ago this week: Monsters Inc.
NO TIME TO DIE SURPASSES $700 MILLION _ A one of the longest-delayed movies of the pandemic, it would be an understatement to say that there was plenty of pent-up demand among audiences to see No Time to Die, which arrived eighteen months behind schedule and has spent the seven weeks since absolutely dominating the box office. The 25th installment in the James Bond franchise crossed the $700 million mark over the weekend, making it just the second Hollywood movie since 2019 to do so.
YELLOWSTONE HAS HUGE SEASON 4 PREMIERE _ With as much anticipation Yellowstone Season 4 had, it was inevitable that the opening episode would blow the competition out of the water. And sure enough, it did. John, Beth, Rip and the rest of the Dutton crew have taken the TV world by storm. According to Variety, the show reached a staggering 14.7 million viewers in its Season 4 premiere, with zero boost from streaming.
🔈 MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY IS A SELF-PROCLAIMED PICKLE EXPERT _ Husband. Father. Actor. Professor. Potential politician. And now, pickle expert. In his latest very on brand Instagram video, Matthew McConaughey breaks down the magic of pickles. Why? Only he knows, but as it turns out Matthew McConaughey can make just about anything interesting — even pickles. • IMAGE
NBC’S POST-SUPER BOWL 56 SHOW WILL BE THE WINTER OLYMPICS _ NBC will try a completely different strategy after next year’s Super Bowl. Instead of airing an episode of a new or existing series behind Super Bowl 56, the network will immediately flip back to Winter Olympics coverage.
… The 2022 Super Bowl takes place on February 13, which places it right in the middle of the Beijing Winter Olympics (which will be held February 4 through 20). That marks the first time a network has aired both right at the same time, and as a result, NBC’s strategists have decided the best way to hold on to that live Super Bowl audience is to keep them engaged with more live sporting events.
… Earlier this year, CBS ran the series premiere of The Equalizer after Super Bowl 55.
OBI-WAN KENOBI PREVIEW SHOWS EWAN MCGREGOR AND HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN IN LIGHTSABER REMATCH _ Obi-Wan Kenobi and Darth Vader will face off once again in the Disney+ series Obi-Wan Kenobi — at least, that is the strong implication in a sneak peak of the Lucasfilm production released on the streamer on November 12.
… While the preview did not include any footage from the series, concept art appears to show Obi-Wan (Ewan McGregor) and Vader (Hayden Christensen) locked in a lightsaber battle. McGregor further underlined the confrontation in an interview in the preview: “To have another swing at each other might be quite satisfying.”
… Obi-Wan Kenobi will premiere in 2022.
JENNIFER GARNER JOINS APPLE DRAMA SERIES THE LAST THING HE TOLD ME _ Jennifer Garner is now set to star in the upcoming Apple drama series The Last Thing He Told Me. Garner takes over the role from Julia Roberts, who reportedly pulled out due to a scheduling issue. The series is based on the book of the same name by Laura Dave.
SHIA LABEOUF ABOUT TO BE A DAD? _ Shia LaBeouf may soon be living the dad life, assuming he and Mia Goth are expecting — and it sure looks like they are from this. The actors were spotted at a Chuck E. Cheese restaurant Saturday where she looked very pregnant as they hit the arcade games together.
… Shia and Mia have recently reconciled … being spotted out together and getting cozy since at least last year — this after his brief stint with FKA Twigs. They’ve even been seen rocking their wedding bands anew, something most everyone thought was done with after 2018.
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A woman laughs and says “Thank you very much.”
McCONAUGHEY TALKS PICKLES
[ November 15 Entertainment ] Matthew McConaughey hopped on social media to talk pickles.
HOW DID YOU GET STUCK?
Share your getting stuck story and then open the phones. Here’s a pretty crazy one from one of your callers.
Lots of Thanksgiving related drops.
THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW YESTERDAY
• Before they were sold nationally, Pop-Tarts were tested in Cleveland in 1963.
• It’s impossible to hum while holding your nose.
• Your stomach acid is strong enough to dissolve metal.
• Golf is the only sport to have been played on the moon.
• Lobsters used to be so cheap that they were frequently used to feed prisoners.
• Cheese is the most shoplifted food in the world.
• You can’t visit the world’s biggest waterfall, because it’s actually deep underwater in the ocean, between Iceland and Greenland.
WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LEMONS?
Like many newspapers, the Las Vegas Journal Review has a garden columnist who occasionally answers readers question. Here is the most recent question tackled by columnist Bob Morris:
Q: The last time I counted the lemons on my lemon tree, I counted 13 or 14. Today, I only have six lemons left on my tree. Can you explain what happened?
I think someone stole your lemons. If a rat or other vermin ate the fruit or it dropped to the ground, the remnants of the fruit would be near or still hanging on the tree. Humans pick fruit still immature, and they dump it when it doesn’t taste good. Unfortunately, lemons and limes never ripen after they have been picked.
WHY IS YOUR PET AN IDIOT?
🗣 TOPIC: We love our pets but sometimes they do dumb stuff. What’s the dumb thing your pet does? Here’s what a few people on reddit had to say:
• My last dog was terrified of thunder to the point that she would need to get on someone’s lap and shake for hours. Here’s a small list of things she often mistook for thunder: The UPS truck; any song with even a small amount of bass; a plane flying overhead; a cloud’s shadow if she was outside.
• She’ll go to the back door and ask to be let out, see it’s raining, and change her mind. And then she’ll go to the front door and ask to be let out, see it’s raining, and change her mind. And then she’ll go to the side door…
• She will chase the shadow of a thrown ball rather than the ball itself.
• His own farts confuse him. Often when he’s lying down and starts to let one out, he turns his head around and looks at his backside all puzzled.
• Whenever my cat will chase a spider, and eventually catch it, she lifts up her paw to make sure it is still there, allowing it to escape and hide.
• My cat is loud all the time — just walks around the house yowling his head off. Unless he’s stuck somewhere. Then he’s very patient and silent. Hours later we’re like, “Hey, anyone seen the cat?” and we realize the dummy locked himself in a closet.
• My chocolate lab is 9 months old and doesn’t know how to drink water properly. Instead of standing and lapping up the water like a normal dog he lays on his side and dunks half his head into his water bowl and gulps it.
TRIVIA: This body part makes up just 2 percent of a person’s total body weight, yet it requires 25 percent of all oxygen used by the body. (Brain)
TRIVIA: What ubiquitous phrase was first seen in the Dallas Morning News in 1951? (Fast food)
WHO SAID IT?
“No, I never though about murder… I never could kill anybody, ever. Not that there aren’t people who need killing.”
• Johnny Cash*
• Jerry Seinfeld
• Clint Eastwood
• Dolly Parton
Each answer begins with the corresponding letter in BINGO.
• A 1980s comedy/fantasy starring Michael Keaton as a ghost. (Beetlejuice)
• Something you put in a drink to cool it down. (Ice)
• This natural wonder is located on the border between the United States and Canada. (Niagara Falls)
• It’s what a jury finds bad people. (Guilty)
• It’s a fruit that’s also a color. (Orange)
HOLE IN THE HEADLINE
Guess the word that’s missing from this news headline: POLICE OFFICER’S ______ REATTACHED AFTER DRUNK DRIVER BITES IT OFF!
C) Pinky toe
A police officer in Taiwan had to have his thumb reattached by surgeons after a drunk driver bit it off while resisting arrest.